Afternoon and welcome to Countdown on a Bank Holiday or if you're as sad, pathetic and lonely as I am then Bank Holidays tend to be Wank Holidays. It's a special show today for one apterite as he finally bit the bullet and applied for his favourite TV game show but he'll have is work cut out as the current champion is on quite a roll...
C1: Champion Dave Taylor (4 wins, 335 points.)
C2: Challenger Andy Wilson.
DC: Susie Dent and John Inverdale.
RR: Rachel Riley.
OT: Other words or solutions.
R01: R E T R U G P A O
R02: T I M R E T A U L
R03: S I M T A R E F I
R04: D O T E I Z E N M
R05: 25, 9, 4, 9, 5, 5. Target: 855.
TTT: TIMESIDE - "Bill's had a breakdown by the look of things"
R06: N R T A I E S O M
R07: N U J P A S E V O
R08: L C R I E U N G I
R09: L A N E V G O W A
R10: 2, 9, 2, 6, 10, 5. Target: 924.
TTT: DARNYULE - "Is it used by a Spanish speaking carpet fitter?"
R11: T E X P O T A P E
R12: F L D O A E S N O
R13: Q I R D E S A H C
R14: 6, 4, 8, 4, 3, 6. Target: 165.
R15: F E T I D F E R N (conundrum)
And now a brief interlude before our main feature:
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So Dave Taylor has managed 4 wins so far and he looked pretty composed all last week and very relaxed which is a good place to be when you're in that seat. Dave Taylor also has the claim to fame of beating the Eggheads and I just had a look at the wiki page for Eggheads which is actually pretty cool as it lists all the winners and other little bits of information too in some cases. Dave said this was 7 years ago which would place the win in 2004 meaning it was in Series 2. So Dave was either in Spaghetti or in Streatham Massive although when I first looked I did think he may have been in the second ever team to beat the Eggheads...Folically Challenged (assuming that the neologism 'folically' refers to hair follicles rather than vitamin B).
Andy Wilson is the challenger and he has made the trip over from Cork, Ireland. I believe his first trip to the Countdown studios was back in November 2009 and so just under 2 years later he is back for the second time, on this occasion, in front of the cameras. One thing Andy loves more than Countdown is his music. He is a talented musician who plays in two bands and plays gigs in Ireland. When he isn't singing he is a Youth Hostel receptionist who dreams that one day he will drive across the United States...but he needs to get his driving licence first! Andy is also sporting a beard that has received the seal of approval by beard-wearer Richard Brittain (despite Richard having shaved quite recently).
Enjoy the show.
Round 1: R E T R U G P A O
C1: PORTAGE (7)
C2: OUTRAGE (7)
DC: GROUPER (7)
OT: GROUTER (7) POTAGER (7) PRAETOR (7) PRORATE (7) RAPTURE (7) REGROUP (7) TROUPER (7)
Score: 7–7 (max 7)
Dave makes a late spot in this opening round having probably only had a 6 written down until the final gong but Andy has a 7 too so thats fine really. An easy opener for both. Has Dave had a haircut?
Round 2: T I M R E T A U L
C1: ULTIMATE (8)
C2: MATURE (6)
DC: MUTILATE (8)
OT: REMITTAL (8)
Score: 15–7 (max 15)
Another last second spot from Dave sees him take the lead and Andy is left behind with just a 6 in this one. DC come up with the very nice anagram of ULTIMATE despite the word itself not being very nice.
Round 3: S I M T A R E F I
C1: FAIREST (7)
C2: FAIREST (7)
DC: AIRTIME (7) airtimes FRIES (5)
OT: RAMIFIES (8) RATIFIES (8) SERIATIM (8)
Score: 22–14 (max 23)
The two lads match up again like in Round 1 although a hat-trick of 8's could have seen one of them strike a blow. Tricky 8's to get though, particularly SERIATIM despite the common letters.
Round 4: D O T E I Z E N M
C1: TIMED (5)
C2: DEMONIZE (8)
OT: MONETIZED (18)
Score: 22–22 (max 41)
Argh! I really thought Andy would have the 9 here and I was a bit surprised when he said 8 because then I started looking for an 8 which I couldn't see. But DEMONIZE it was and all that matters is he is now back on level terms with Dave the Rave.
Round 5: 25, 9, 4, 9, 5, 5. Target: 855.
C1: 855. 9*4*25-9*5 (10)
C2: 850.
Score: 32–22 (max 51)
Andy won't mind me saying this as I am sure he would have been spitting feathers after missing this first numbers game which despite a high target worked out quite nicely. Dave goes ahead once again.
DC Guest Time: John Inverdale is back and since doing Countdown last time he has apparently biked from Land's End to John O'Groats (LEJOG - an infamous moment on Eggheads). He was saying though that he was disappointed by people's reaction to the fact he'd just cycled the length of the UK and so is now looking for new challenges to astound people with. He mentions a man who has rewrote books from back to front; that is, writing every individual word backwords!
Teatime teaser: TIMESIDE -> ITEMISED
Round 6: N R T A I E S O M
C1: AMORTISE (8)
C2: ATOMISER (8)
DC: AMNIOTES (8)
OT: MINARETS (8) MONSTERA (8) MORAINES (8) NOTARIES (8) NOTARISE (8) RAIMENTS (8) ROMAINES (8) ROMANISE (8) STOREMAN (8)
Score: 40–30 (max 59)
If Dave or Andy didn't get an 8 here then they'd have needed a smack bottom.
Round 7: N U J P A S E V O
C1: VANES (5)
C2: PANES (5)
DC: PAEONS (6)
OT: NAEVUS (6) VENOUS (6)
Score: 45–35 (max 65)
Andy will have been all too familiar with PAEONS when DC announced it and so he will have to wait for another opportunity to bite back at Dave's lead.
Round 8: L C R I E U N G I
C1: CURLING (7)
C2: CLINGIER (8)
Score: 45–43 (max 73)
And this is it. The spot of the match so far! With a darrenic 8 (beating Dave, DC and me) Andy closes up to just 2 points.
Round 9: L A N E V G O W A
C1: WANGLE (6)
C2: ANGEL (5)
DC: LOVAGE (6)
OT: ANALOG (6) ANLAGE (6) AVOWAL (6) GALENA (6) LAGENA (6) LAVAGE (6)
Score: 51–43 (max 79)
Ack! But immediately he lets Dave get away again although only by 6 points.
Susie: She talks about trademarks today. I got trademark for 9 in the early hours of this morning.
Round 10: 2, 9, 2, 6, 10, 5. Target: 924.
C1: 946.
C2: 926. (2*5*9+2)*10+6 (7)
RR: 924. ((2+6)*9+5)*(10+2) (10)
Score: 51–50 (max 89)
The trademark Wilson 6 small is on show here and it works for him as Dave is left completely adrift in this one leaving Andy to steal in with a solution just 2 away from the large target. Rachel manages to solve this by doing 12 x 77 which is just outrageous! Well done her and everyone else who got it.
Teatime teaser: DARNYULE -> UNDERLAY
Round 11: T E X P O T A P E
C1: TEAPOT (6)
C2: TEAPOT (6)
DC: TAPPET (6)
OT: PATTEE (6)
Score: 57–56 (max 95)
I really wanted the final vowel to be an O so that Andy could say POTATO (preferably in a Keith Lemon voice). Is that racist? Oh well, TEAPOT it is which is equally just as awesome considering that this is Countdown. I think TEAPOT is one of those words along with LEOTARD that people want to get on the show due to the nature of them.
Round 12: F L D O A E S N O
C1: FONDLES (7)
C2: sloaned
DC: NOODLES (7) SEAFOOD (7)
OT: ANDOSOL (7) ENFOLDS (7) ONEFOLD (7)
Score: 64–56 (max 102)
Andy is forced to gamble for a 7 after hearing Dave declare his 7 but no such luck for the Irish wonder. He is still within 10 points though which is the most important thing as we head in to Round 13.
Round 13: Q I R D E S A H C
C1: CASHIER (7)
C2: CHAIRED (7)
DC: CARDIES (7)
OT: RACHIDES (8)
Score: 71–63 (max 110)
Ooooo a chance perhaps for Andy to draw exactly level with Dave as a typical apterite word makes itself known. It is a tough spot though highlighted by the fact that DC do not get near it either. I always get images of Deirdre Rachid's jam jar glasses and goosey neck when I see RACHIDES. I bet it's not even pronounced like her surname. It means the stem of a plant.
Round 14: 6, 4, 8, 4, 3, 6. Target: 165.
C1: 163. (6+4+4+6)*8+3 (7)
C2: 164. Mistake in working.
RR: 165. (6*6+4)*4+8-3 (10)
Score: 78–63 (max 120)
This was agonising for me to watch. As soon as I heard Andy say "164 not written down" I smelt trouble in the air as so often we see contestants crumble when their numbers aren't written in front of them. Unfortunately this happens to Andy which means Dave has the all-too-easy task of reading his 163 from his paper and for the first time in Dave's run I disliked him for a brief second - not for being Dave, but for having beaten Andy.
This is maybe a dickhead thing to add but I mentioned it last week in my recap at the same point. I thought the tactics were wrong at this stage of the game. Being 8 points behind before this numbers game meant the only way Andy could win would be by winning it on a crucial conundrum and I would soon rather try and assure myself of getting to the crucial conundrum stage rather than losing the game in round 14. So my pick would have always been for 1 large in this case which is statistically the easiest way of guaranteeing 10 points for a human. Especially considering that Andy's conundrum ability would be better than Dave's too. But maybe I am speaking out of term although I daresay Andy might have given this some thought after the recording?
I'll shut up now!
Round 15: F E T I D F E R N
C2 buzzes on 2 seconds to say DIFFERENT which is correct.
Final Score: 78–73 (max 130)
And sod's law Andy does get the conundrum which is a bit of a kick in the bollocks. I feel disappointed for Andy but I know that I shouldn't be because he won't be and you can see he loved every minute of being on Countdown and after all, that is the best part of it. Just being on the show. That old cliched saying - "it's the taking part that counts".
Well done to Dave on another fine performance to squeak past an apterite. No doubt Damian was smiling manically up in the gallery like some supervillain after seeing an apterite lose whilst he gets his piece of chalk and adds on one more tally to his blackboard, hoping that one day, just one day he will get even with the Reams.*
To be continued...
*For legal reasons I should add that Damian is a very nice man and excellent at his job and this claim that he is some supervillain (like Baron Greenback at the end of a Danger Mouse episode) is completely false and based on my own humour (if it can be called humour). It is just a notion towards how influential apterous has become on Channel 4's most loved daytime TV show. I don't want every ITV lawyer crawling over this recap with a view to closing me down.
Further summaries are at:
http://www.apterous.org/cdb/series.php?series=65
