If countdown were a reality show!!

[CF Warran]

If countdown were a reality show, would you vote charlie off?
i would vote off hitler?

[Ben Hunter]

I'd vote tactically.

[Lesley Hines]

'K dude, really confused.

Should this thread be in the games and puzzles section? Are there more cryptic clues to follow, or is this a bit like the football thread and only suitable for blokes? Surely the democratic this to do would be to let everyone have two votes of who to vote off, and then throw it open to the general public for us all to make huge amounts of cash on them being led by edits and production.

Your system of 'only one man up' does seem a little engineered, even for a BB parody.

[CF Warran]

sorry that people were not able to vote due to "il douche" locking the thread (even i cannot reply)

this could have seen some interesting debate

[Lesley Hines]

You've done this to my brain, now...

[Ian Volante]

I'm trying to work out if I should credit "il douche" as being an excellent pun or just bad spelling. There's little other redemption I see appearing in this thread.

[Michael Wallace]

I would vote off the contestant who finished the show with the fewest points.

[CF Warran]

ian volante if that is your real name i don't think you are widely known for bad spelling so i wouldn't worry about it you will probably get better with practice anyway

i don't think the person you vote off needs to be one of the contestants, you could always vote off someone like carol vordeman (although that happened already i think )
you could even vote off the clock but then no one would now it was time to stop countdown

[Ian Volante]

ian volante if that is your real name i don't think you are widely known for bad spelling so i wouldn't worry about it you will probably get better with practice anyway

i don't think the person you vote off needs to be one of the contestants, you could always vote off someone like carol vordeman (although that happened already i think )
you could even vote off the clock but then no one would now it was time to stop countdown

CF, have you met Dmitry?

[CF Warran]

CF, have you met Dmitry?

dmitry and i were on a series of countdown together unfortunately it was an imaginary series you can read about it on the wiki captain kirk was the dictionary corner guest and it turned out rachel was an alien

i was very surprised

[Marc Meakin]

CF, have you met Dmitry?

dmitry and i were on a series of countdown together unfortunately it was an imaginary series you can read about it on the wiki captain kirk was the dictionary corner guest and it turned out rachel was an alien

i was very surprised

Well at least I now know what CF must stand for.

[CF Warran]

Well at least I now know what CF must stand for.

the internet seems to think that cf stands for cystic fibrosis however i wont stand for it because it is a disease which must be eradicated like the jews

don't eradicate me though please mark i just want to be friends

[Marc Meakin]

Well at least I now know what CF must stand for.

the internet seems to think that cf stands for cystic fibrosis however i wont stand for it because it is a disease which must be eradicated like the jews

don't eradicate me though please mark i just want to be friends

i'll be your friend especially if you spell my name right.
BTW i am half Jewish, but I wont say which half.

[CF Warran]

i'll be your friend especially if you spell my name right.
BTW i am half Jewish, but I wont say which half.

it would be annoying if it was half by weight and all your internal organs make up half the weight of your body and that was the half of you that was jewish
then you would not be able to eat not kosher food even though you could rub bacon all over your face and it wouldn't matter you still wouldn't be able to eat it because it would damage your jew powers and i heard that bacon was really delicious (but i can't eat it)

i will make sure to make your name right in future, also if your jewish you should remember the sermon on the mount wear jesus says that blessed are the Meek(in) for they shall inheirit the earth so maybe something good is coming your way sometime soon
although if you inherit the earth can i still live on it

[Marc Meakin]

Something good eh, hope so as I am 4 hours away from having an aortic valve replacement
Hope they don't put a porcine one in.

[CF Warran]

Something good eh, hope so as I am 4 hours away from having an aortic valve replacement
Hope they don't put a porcine one in.

ok shut up now mark you are annoying me

[Liam Tiernan]

also if your jewish you should remember the sermon on the mount

I doubt it, CF, since that's Christian teaching, not Jewish. (unless there are some 2000 year-old witnesses knocking about)

[CF Warran]

I doubt it, CF, since that's Christian teaching, not Jewish. (unless there are some 2000 year-old witnesses knocking about)

hi liam that sounds like the kind of thing a jew would say

but back to the question at hand who would you vote off from the countdown reality show because i want to know everyones opinion

[Gavin Chipper]

it would be annoying if it was half by weight

It might be just the nose.

[Liam Tiernan]

it would be annoying if it was half by weight

It might be just the nose.

I believe they compensate by shedding weight elsewhere.

[CF Warran]

it would be annoying if it was half by weight

It might be just the nose.

I believe they compensate by shedding weight elsewhere.

dear laim,
i would like you to explain your joke please because i do not get it are you saying that all the energy expended by growing a nose causes an energy (and thus mass because energy is mass i have watched star trek spock is cool) deficit elsewhere
i like racism and i donot want to be left out if we are about to call someone a nigger here

yours sincerely cf

[Liam Tiernan]

I believe they compensate by shedding weight elsewhere.

dear laim,
i would like you to explain your joke please because i do not get it are you saying that all the energy expended by growing a nose causes an energy (and thus mass because energy is mass i have watched star trek spock is cool) deficit elsewhere
i like racism and i donot want to be left out if we are about to call someone a nigger here

yours sincerely cf

No, I don't mean an energy deficit, I mean an actual mass deficit, (i.e. something missing). Think about it. Mull it over for a while. Chew on it a bit. It'll come to you.

[CF Warran]

I believe they compensate by shedding weight elsewhere.

dear laim,
i would like you to explain your joke please because i do not get it are you saying that all the energy expended by growing a nose causes an energy (and thus mass because energy is mass i have watched star trek spock is cool) deficit elsewhere
i like racism and i donot want to be left out if we are about to call someone a nigger here

yours sincerely cf

No, I don't mean an energy deficit, I mean an actual mass deficit, (i.e. something missing). Think about it. Mull it over for a while. Chew on it a bit. It'll come to you.

well now i have chewed on it for a bit and mull it over the only thing that comes to me ist that a) you are and idiot 2) that i hate you
and i want you to die

p.s. good luck

[Liam Tiernan]

i like racism and i donot want to be left out if we are about to call someone a nigger here

yours sincerely cf

How about 'coon boy. Would that be OK?

[CF Warran]

i like racism and i donot want to be left out if we are about to call someone a nigger here

yours sincerely cf

How about 'coon boy. Would that be OK?

no, shut up
i fucked your mum and now i'm going to fuck you.
i'm going to make you bleed and squeal piggy.
oink oiink
filthy pig bitch

[CF Warran]

haha sorry liam ternan my friend had accessed my computer how terrible

[Liam Tiernan]

i like racism and i donot want to be left out if we are about to call someone a nigger here

yours sincerely cf

How about 'coon boy. Would that be OK?

no, shut up
i fucked your mum and now i'm going to fuck you.
i'm going to make you bleed and squeal piggy.
oink oiink
filthy pig bitch

Seriously, how old are you?

[Lesley Hines]

Hey Raccoon, do us a favour and mention to CF there's someone masquerading as him on the forum.

I'd have suspected it really was him, but there hasn't been a single mention of a vagina anywhere yet, so it must be an imposter. Check his posts for secret Slovak subtexts.

[Marc Meakin]

my new heart valve keepsd clicking, if I keep the receipt can I take it back?

[Liam Tiernan]

my new heart valve keepsd clicking, if I keep the receipt can I take it back?

Good to see you back, Marc. So now you've got a clicky ticker, eh? Better than a dicky one, I suppose.

[Lesley Hines]

^What he said. Hope you're back to full throttle soon xx

[Marc Meakin]

Thanks, its good to be back.
Can't believe they are sending me home 5 days after the op though.
Still I have over 2 weeks of countdown to catch up on.