Best screenshot

Charlie Reams · Post by **Charlie Reams** » Wed Jul 23, 2008 10:33 pm

I humbly submit this as the one that made me laugh the most so far. I had nothing useful to declare so went for the childish 9, but Gyles actually managed to outdo me with his double entrendre.

Another entry illustrating the dangers of stock dialogue:

Dinos Sfyris · Post by **Dinos Sfyris** » Wed Aug 27, 2008 6:19 pm

Just played Raccoon boy with Jo Brand in DC, and in round 13 RMKRAEOOP we both had REMARK but Jo uttered this little beauty:

"Susie has come good again with MOREPORK which is new to me!" I'm sure it isn't new to her

although realistically she would get the word POOMAKER!

JimBentley · Post by **JimBentley** » Tue Sep 16, 2008 8:00 pm

I liked this:

Martin Gardner · Post by **Martin Gardner** » Thu Sep 25, 2008 9:00 pm

Try this one and this one. I admit they don't match what's gone before them.

Julian Fell · Post by **Julian Fell** » Thu Sep 25, 2008 9:46 pm

jimbentley wrote:I liked this:

Kirk Bevins · Post by **Kirk Bevins** » Thu Sep 25, 2008 11:46 pm

Julian Fell wrote:
jimbentley wrote:I liked this:

Funniest

Thing

Ever

Charlie Reams · Post by **Charlie Reams** » Fri Sep 26, 2008 10:00 am

Not that funny, but one of those weird things that happens in testing sometimes. I'm sure you can figure out what went wrong:

Martin Gardner · Post by **Martin Gardner** » Fri Sep 26, 2008 10:40 am

Interestingly enough today, it gave me the conundrum PEEORGANS, I'll leave you to work out the answer.

Charlie Reams · Post by **Charlie Reams** » Fri Sep 26, 2008 10:45 am

Martin Gardner wrote:Interestingly enough today, it gave me the conundrum PEEORGANS, I'll leave you to work out the answer.

Haha. On a similar theme I've had ASSWIENER and VAGINALEZ, but forgot to screenshot them.

Martin Gardner · Post by **Martin Gardner** » Sun Sep 28, 2008 4:35 pm

Charlie Reams wrote:
Martin Gardner wrote:Interestingly enough today, it gave me the conundrum PEEORGANS, I'll leave you to work out the answer.
Haha. On a similar theme I've had ASSWIENER and VAGINALEZ, but forgot to screenshot them.

One of today's was NEXTSHITE

Gavin Chipper · Post by **Gavin Chipper** » Sun Sep 28, 2008 5:08 pm

I don't know if this has been explained elsewhere, but broadly speaking, how are conundrums set?

Charlie Reams · Post by **Charlie Reams** » Sun Sep 28, 2008 6:52 pm

Gavin Chipper wrote:I don't know if this has been explained elsewhere, but broadly speaking, how are conundrums set?

It picks an answer at random from a list of all the valid 9s in the dictionary (somewhat hand-filtered to eliminate anything ultra-obscure.) Then, it tries to split the word into two subwords (of length 3/6 or 4/5), and if successful sets that as the conundrum. If that doesn't work, it tries to extract one subword and appends the rest of the letters as shuffled junk (this works quite well because you can normally find a subword of 7 or 8 and no one asks many questions about some junk on the end.) If even that proves impossible, it just shuffles them at random. Oh, and any candidate shuffle is filtered to make sure it doesn't look too much like the answer (otherwise the process of extracting subwords tends to give you stuff like COMBHONEY.) There might be some other black magic involved that I don't remember, but that's the essence of it.

Julian Fell · Post by **Julian Fell** » Mon Sep 29, 2008 10:05 am

Martin Gardner wrote:
Charlie Reams wrote:
Martin Gardner wrote:Interestingly enough today, it gave me the conundrum PEEORGANS, I'll leave you to work out the answer.
Haha. On a similar theme I've had ASSWIENER and VAGINALEZ, but forgot to screenshot them.
One of today's was NEXTSHITE

I think your program has a dirty mind, Charlie. I remember that in one of Paul Howe's games in COGST, there was a really flat round with loads of alternative 5s, and one of the ones it chose to display in the recap was QUIMS

Martin Gardner · Post by **Martin Gardner** » Thu Oct 02, 2008 8:13 pm

Julian Fell wrote: I think your program has a dirty mind, Charlie. I remember that in one of Paul Howe's games in COGST, there was a really flat round with loads of alternative 5s, and one of the ones it chose to display in the recap was QUIMS

I think it actually gives them in alpha-order.

Charlie Reams · Post by **Charlie Reams** » Thu Oct 02, 2008 8:31 pm

Martin Gardner wrote:I think it actually gives them in alpha-order.

I think you could have fairly easily confirmed that it doesn't.

JimBentley · Post by **JimBentley** » Sun Oct 05, 2008 12:11 pm

I know it's probably the start of a gradual decline into complete insanity when you start talking back to the bots, but I couldn't help myself. I hate Apterous Prime, the smug shit.

Gavin Chipper · Post by **Gavin Chipper** » Sun Oct 05, 2008 12:42 pm

I talk to the bots too, if it's any consolation. I'm always a little wary of Apterous Prime when he says he likes a tight one.

Dinos Sfyris · Post by **Dinos Sfyris** » Sun Oct 05, 2008 3:42 pm

Haha! I do it too! Priceless

Joseph Bolas · Post by **Joseph Bolas** » Sun Oct 05, 2008 6:58 pm

jimbentley wrote:

I know it's probably the start of a gradual decline into complete insanity when you start talking back to the bots, but I couldn't help myself. I hate Apterous Prime, the smug shit.

I've never talk to the bot myself, but sometimes there come up with weird words and you think how the fuck did they know that, so you do want to tell them to fuck off.

Kirk Bevins · Post by **Kirk Bevins** » Mon Oct 06, 2008 5:48 pm

Joseph Bolas wrote:
jimbentley wrote:

I know it's probably the start of a gradual decline into complete insanity when you start talking back to the bots, but I couldn't help myself. I hate Apterous Prime, the smug shit.
I've never talk to the bot myself, but sometimes there come up with weird words and you think how the fuck did they know that, so you do want to tell them to fuck off.

You better not play Julian, Conor or Paul then - they might punch you.

Paul Howe · Post by **Paul Howe** » Mon Oct 06, 2008 6:24 pm

Kirk Bevins wrote:
Joseph Bolas wrote:
jimbentley wrote:

I know it's probably the start of a gradual decline into complete insanity when you start talking back to the bots, but I couldn't help myself. I hate Apterous Prime, the smug shit.
I've never talk to the bot myself, but sometimes there come up with weird words and you think how the fuck did they know that, so you do want to tell them to fuck off.
You better not play Julian, Conor or Paul then - they might punch you.

You can do that over the internet !? Must be that clever new violence over IP (VoIP) we've been hearing so much about. So many wasted opportunities

Joseph Bolas · Post by **Joseph Bolas** » Tue Oct 07, 2008 3:19 am

Kirk Bevins wrote:
Joseph Bolas wrote:
jimbentley wrote:

I know it's probably the start of a gradual decline into complete insanity when you start talking back to the bots, but I couldn't help myself. I hate Apterous Prime, the smug shit.
I've never talk to the bot myself, but sometimes there come up with weird words and you think how the fuck did they know that, so you do want to tell them to fuck off.
You better not play Julian, Conor or Paul then - they might punch you.

Well, I've played against Conor before (at COLIN) and played Paul online (in COGST) and obviously I got thrashed in both games

, but I don't think I've sweared at them. Infact I was quite apologetic to Conor for not giving him a decent match

Kai Laddiman · Post by **Kai Laddiman** » Sat Nov 22, 2008 12:51 pm

I couldn't screenshot it but my numbers in my 174-round game against Prune were:

50 2 1 6 10 5 Target: 1353

A 4-figure target?

Kai Laddiman · Post by **Kai Laddiman** » Sat Nov 22, 2008 12:53 pm

I think the apocalypse mucked everything up. I just got:

25 50 75 100 3 6 Target: 1603

Phil Reynolds · Post by **Phil Reynolds** » Sat Nov 22, 2008 2:16 pm

Don't have screenshots but I've had several dialogues along the lines of "I got BEATEN" and some ruder ones I can't recall. Now that this thread has been bumped (i.e. now that I know about it) I'll take more careful notice.

Phil Reynolds · Post by **Phil Reynolds** » Mon Nov 24, 2008 12:04 pm

This one amused me on a number of levels:

(What's embarrassing is that I still lost the game...)

Phil Reynolds · Post by **Phil Reynolds** » Thu Dec 04, 2008 11:51 pm

I know Susie is renowned for being ladylike (at least on screen) but this takes the biscuit:

Paul Howe · Post by **Paul Howe** » Fri Dec 05, 2008 12:11 am

Completely failed to get a screenshot, but Brian Blessed told me I could've picked a D for DICKHEAD in a speedgoat yestreday. The bastard.

Oh yeah and I got some negative numbers to appear in my numbers solution, as Jon Corby will strenuously deny.

Joseph Bolas · Post by **Joseph Bolas** » Fri Dec 05, 2008 12:13 am

Paul Howe wrote:Oh yeah and I got some negative numbers to appear in my numbers solution, as Jon Corby will strenuously deny.

I don't have a screenshot either, but I myself have used a negative number in a solution

Jon Corby · Post by **Jon Corby** » Fri Dec 05, 2008 12:15 am

Paul Howe wrote:Completely failed to get a screenshot, but Brian Blessed told me I could've picked a D for DICKHEAD in a speedgoat yestreday. The bastard.

Oh yeah and I got some negative numbers to appear in my numbers solution, as Jon Corby will strenuously deny.

Lies. All lies.

Joseph Bolas · Post by **Joseph Bolas** » Fri Dec 05, 2008 12:25 am

Kai Laddiman · Post by **Kai Laddiman** » Fri Dec 05, 2008 10:56 am

Martin Gardner wrote:
Charlie Reams wrote:
Martin Gardner wrote:Interestingly enough today, it gave me the conundrum PEEORGANS, I'll leave you to work out the answer.
Haha. On a similar theme I've had ASSWIENER and VAGINALEZ, but forgot to screenshot them.
One of today's was NEXTSHITE

I have recently had an easy but funny conundrum CUNTSGILT.

John Evans · Post by **John Evans** » Wed Dec 10, 2008 9:24 pm

Kai Laddiman wrote: I have recently had an easy but funny conundrum CUNTSGILT.

I think this needs a "sorry Kai" from someone.

Kai Laddiman · Post by **Kai Laddiman** » Thu Dec 11, 2008 10:55 am

John Evans wrote:
Kai Laddiman wrote: I have recently had an easy but funny conundrum CUNTSGILT.
I think this needs a "sorry Kai" from someone.

(For those who don't know, it's DoD

)

Michael Wallace · Post by **Michael Wallace** » Mon Dec 15, 2008 12:14 am

Some good advice here:

(I appreciate that this isn't actually very funny, but now I've gone to the effort of cropping it, so eh)

Phil Reynolds · Post by **Phil Reynolds** » Mon Dec 15, 2008 9:36 am

Geoffrey was obviously as confused as Rick:

Charlie Reams · Post by **Charlie Reams** » Mon Dec 15, 2008 1:59 pm

Phil Reynolds wrote:Geoffrey was obviously as confused as Rick:

Not sure why people think this is a bug. Picking W would have given DILEMMAS, and it's mentioned because it's better than what you did pick (T) because there are fewer alternatives.

Michael Wallace · Post by **Michael Wallace** » Tue Dec 16, 2008 2:22 am

Charlie Reams wrote:it's mentioned because it's better than what you did pick (T) because there are fewer alternatives.

Ah, I hadn't worked this bit out, clever stuff.

edit: although now I think about it, I have some excuse since the alternative was not strictly better, unless I've missed something, which is always possible

Charlie Reams · Post by **Charlie Reams** » Tue Dec 16, 2008 1:29 pm

Michael Wallace wrote: edit: although now I think about it, I have some excuse since the alternative was not strictly better, unless I've missed something, which is always possible

That bit was @ Phil. In your case it was just an equally good alternative. I guess the dialogue could be more explanatory but I got bored of fiddling with it.

Gavin Chipper · Post by **Gavin Chipper** » Tue Dec 16, 2008 7:09 pm

Charlie Reams wrote:
Phil Reynolds wrote:Geoffrey was obviously as confused as Rick:
Not sure why people think this is a bug. Picking W would have given DILEMMAS, and it's mentioned because it's better than what you did pick (T) because there are fewer alternatives.

OK, but it's not obvious that that's the thinking, so you must be sure really!

Ian Volante · Post by **Ian Volante** » Fri Dec 19, 2008 6:16 pm

This one I do rather like, although it put me off the solution:

Joseph Bolas · Post by **Joseph Bolas** » Fri Dec 19, 2008 10:46 pm

Ian Volante wrote:This one I do rather like, although it put me off the solution:

For me, one of the best conundrums I've had was BOLASBREW

Ian Volante · Post by **Ian Volante** » Sun Dec 21, 2008 1:47 pm

And another:

Kai Laddiman · Post by **Kai Laddiman** » Mon Dec 22, 2008 5:03 pm

I got a screenshot but couldn't get it on here (please, someone, tell me how) but:

Des O'Connor: What was your method, Kai?
Kai Laddiman: I did

4+4=8
8x100=800

Des O'Connor: How did you make 800, Apterous?
Apterous Prune: I thought I had it but I made a mistake somewhere.

Ben Wilson · Post by **Ben Wilson** » Wed Dec 24, 2008 10:34 pm

A few I collected in recent weeks, only just got round to uploading-

Practice game (hence the screenshot instead of a recap) of an unlimited csw game against Rex.

Who says Ann Widdecombe isn't classy?

Prune breathes a sigh of relief.

Craig Beevers · Post by **Craig Beevers** » Wed Dec 24, 2008 10:47 pm

OUROBOROSES - awesome.

Phil Reynolds · Post by **Phil Reynolds** » Wed Dec 31, 2008 11:28 am

Sometimes the insertion of a DC word into the template dialogue has an outcome that is truly felicitous:

OK, I admit - the above 'screenshot' is a reconstruction, as I realised how apt* Richard's line was a nanosecond after I'd clicked Done to close the window. I thought it was worth it and hope you agree.

* Putting the 'apt' into apterous, you might say.

Charlie Reams · Post by **Charlie Reams** » Wed Dec 31, 2008 12:23 pm

Phil Reynolds wrote:

Haha, that's great, and worthy of reconstruction.

Paul Howe · Post by **Paul Howe** » Fri Jan 02, 2009 5:41 pm

Ho ho ho

Kai Laddiman · Post by **Kai Laddiman** » Fri Jan 02, 2009 5:43 pm

Paul Howe wrote:Ho ho ho

Paul Howe · Post by **Paul Howe** » Sat Jan 03, 2009 3:13 pm

It's funny (well it made me giggle) because Santa sounds like he's stopping himself from saying hell even though he's just sworn far more grievously.

Kai Laddiman · Post by **Kai Laddiman** » Sat Jan 03, 2009 3:18 pm

Paul Howe wrote:It's funny (well it made me giggle) because Santa sounds like he's stopping himself from saying hell even though he's just sworn far more grievously.

I thought it was because you lost.

Phil Reynolds · Post by **Phil Reynolds** » Sat Jan 03, 2009 3:54 pm

Paul Howe wrote:It's funny (well it made me giggle) because Santa sounds like he's stopping himself from saying hell even though he's just sworn far more grievously.

Yes, but why do you appear to have photographed the screen through a turquoise net curtain?

Paul Howe · Post by **Paul Howe** » Sat Jan 03, 2009 4:42 pm

Phil Reynolds wrote: Yes, but why do you appear to have photographed the screen through a turquoise net curtain?

Sadly that's what my screen looks like since I dropped my laptop a few days ago

I think it's a problem with the graphics card (since you can see it), maybe a loose connector somewhere since if I press down in a particular place it either returns to normal or produces even more psychedelic effects.

Phil Reynolds · Post by **Phil Reynolds** » Thu Jan 08, 2009 3:54 pm

Do you get the impression that maybe Susie rejected Brian's advances in the bar the night before?

Kai Laddiman · Post by **Kai Laddiman** » Thu Jan 08, 2009 9:11 pm

Against Ian Dent I declared that 'I got SHAGGED'.

Joseph Bolas · Post by **Joseph Bolas** » Fri Jan 09, 2009 6:20 pm

Chris Davies · Post by **Chris Davies** » Mon Jan 12, 2009 11:32 pm

OK, get ready for this:

(I did spot AUTUMN just in time, BTW

)

Eoin Monaghan · Post by **Eoin Monaghan** » Thu Jan 15, 2009 1:37 pm

Kai Laddiman wrote:Against Ian Dent I declared that 'I got SHAGGED'.

Ian Dent · Post by **Ian Dent** » Thu Jan 15, 2009 1:50 pm

Kai....