c4countdown

Sorry for a slightly later recap than normal. I dozed off.

So hello and welcome to a Countdown special and in more ways than one a very special recap. You, the lucky c4cers have me recapping every edition of Countdown this week. Awesome, I know.

Lesley Hines wrote: More laydees? Brilliant idea - we can add those nice little touches like how they seem to be feeling, what they're wearing, their make-up, and skip out the numbers solutions altogether. Everyone knows girls are no good at maths

So as a tribute to Lesley's appearance today I thought I would be experimental and recap this special in my alter ego Rihanna Taylor (a 40 year old housewife from Newmarket, Suffolk). Wow, Rihanna is so hot I want to...oh, I'm female now, I mean she's beautiful as a person (I'm not a lesbian or anything).

Countdown recap for Monday 26 July 2010.

C1: Champion Micheal Harris (1 win, 190 points.)
C2: Challenger Lesley Hines. (104 points)
DC: Susie Dent and Gary Osborne.
RR: Rachel Riley.
OT: Other words or solutions.

R01: R T P E O U S D E
R02: K A L N R O I N O
R03: M S I E A R T N E
R04: T I E A M T S N O
R05: 75, 100, 2, 1, 6, 10. Target: 405.
TTT: FATKILOS - "These are rugs but it's all Greek to me"
R06: A U T X E S W S A
R07: I L D A O U P Q R
R08: N E S O N L G A E
R09: N M G A O E D C A
R10: 25, 2, 3, 6, 7, 9. Target: 916.
TTT: HIDORGAN - "Commandeering all the advertising space perhaps"
R11: T C R O A E B F T
R12: R P R L I E I A M
R13: J H S I E A T S O
R14: 75, 50, 3, 1, 5, 10. Target: 240.
R15: E G G G E N E R A (conundrum)


And now a brief interlude before our main feature:

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Micheal Harris is a chef from Cardiff and last year he won one show before crossing paths with eventual record-breaking finalist of series 61, Andrew Hulme. Micheal lost with a score of 101 points spotting POLICEMEN for 9 along the way.

Lesley Hines is from Worcester and runs a guesthouse called The Shrubbery which makes me think of the knights who say "ni". Lesley performed superbly on the show but ran into ginger adolescent Ryan Taylor who fluked a victory by just 2 points. Lesley did us women proud. I am really loving Lesley's top she has on today, where did you get it honey?

Oh my god, Gary Osborne joins Susie in DC today. I just love his work and what he has done for the music industry.

I am so jealous of Rachel's figure, watching Countdown depresses me. Pass me some cake so I can comfort eat.

Can I just say how wonderful I think it is that these 2 are getting another bite at the cherry because Countdown isn't all about winning is it? It's the taking part that counts.

Enjoy the show.

Round 1: R T P E O U S D E

C1: REPOSTED (8)
C2: SPROUTED (8)
DC: POSTURED (8)
OT: DOPESTER (8) PROUDEST (8)
Score: 8–8 (max 8)

8's available and 8's declared. This is why these two players return for this special.

Round 2: K A L N R O I N O

C1: LION (4)
C2: KAOLIN (6)
OT: KROONI (6)
Score: 8–14 (max 14)

Go girl!! Lesley spots the fabulous KAOLIN which is a white clay.

Round 3: M S I E A R T N E

C1: MARINES (7)
C2: REMAINS (7)
DC: TRAINEES (8) MINARETS (8)
OT: EMIRATES (8) STEAMIER (8) MATINEES (8) RAIMENTS (8) RESINATE (8)
Score: 15–21 (max 22)

I had MEN for 3. That's all I can think about, because I'm a woman, you know. I just have cock on the mind.

Round 4: T I E A M T S N O

C1: STAMEN (6)
C2: TOMATINE (8)
OT: AMNIOTES (8)
Score: 15–29 (max 30)

Mmmmm there's MEN again, I don't care if Lesley got a cool scientific 8.

Round 5: 75, 100, 2, 1, 6, 10. Target: 405.

C1: 404. (100+1)*(6-2) (7)
C2: 404. (100+1)*(10-6) (7)
RR: 405. (75+6)*(10/2) (10)
Score: 22–36 (max 40)

Numbers. Pfft I don't care about those. Hunky Jeff does though, he manages to solve it as well as Rachel by doing 100*(6-1)-75-(2*10). It is super hot when Jeff goes better than the contestants, he just oozes of attractiveness. I've taken to watching Soccer Saturday with the hubby just to see his dreamy face.

DC Guest Time: Gary talks about his time as a backing singer on hits with the Rubettes ('Sugar Baby Love') and David Essex ('Gonna Make You a Star').

Teatime teaser: FATKILOS -> FLOKATIS

Round 6: A U T X E S W S A

C1: WASTES (6)
C2: SWEATS (6)
DC: SAUTES (6)
OT: TAWSES (6)
Score: 28–42 (max 46)

SWEATS just reminds me of that period in my life when I kept waking with night sweats when I was pregnant with my eldest. You men have no idea what us women go through being pregnant.

Round 7: I L D A O U P Q R

C1: QUAIL (5)
C2: LIQUOR (6)
DC: DOULA (5)
OT: DIPOLAR (7)
Score: 28–48 (max 53)

I wish I had a DOULA when my baby was on the way, it would have made it so much easier on me.

Round 8: N E S O N L G A E

C1: ANGELS (6)
C2: GLEANS (6)
DC: GASOLENE (8)
Score: 34–54 (max 61)

I've being talking about myself so much that I didn't realise the scores. Lesley is 20 points clear of Micheal. I'm so emotional.

Round 9: N M G A O E D C A

C1: MANAGED (7)
C2: MANAGED (7)
DC: DECAGON (7)
OT: ADENOMA (7) CONGAED (7)
Score: 41–61 (max 68)

Did I take tonights tea out of the freezer to thaw? I think I did. Or did I? I must have done...


Susie's Origin of Words: Susie tells us that "blow the gaff" goes back to originally meaning to expose someone as a cheat in cards. I thought it meant to give head to the manager. That's what I would do to get a promotion.

Round 10: 25, 2, 3, 6, 7, 9. Target: 916.

C1: 916. 2*3*6*25+9+7 (10)
C2: 916. (25*9+7-3)*(6-2) (10)
Score: 51–71 (max 78)

...yeah I'm pretty sure I did.

Teatime teaser: HIDORGAN -> HOARDING

Round 11: T C R O A E B F T

C1: FATTER (6)
C2: BATTER (6)
DC: ABETTOR (7)
Score: 57–77 (max 85)

FATTER you've brought traumatic memories back to me Micheal. I hate you and your stupid unfashionable top.

Round 12: R P R L I E I A M

C1: impailer
C2: IMPERIAL (8)
Score: 57–85 (max 93)

Ha, good one Lesley doing it for all the vagina owners out there.

Round 13: J H S I E A T S O

C1: HEISTS (6)
C2: HOSTS (5)
DC: SIESTA (6) THESIS (6)
OT: SAITHES (7) SOSATIE (7)
Score: 63–85 (max 100)

Micheal comes back with a 6 but that doesn't matter because Lesley has won the game. These breasts are a real hindrance to my typing.

Round 14: 75, 50, 3, 1, 5, 10. Target: 240.

C1: 240. (75-50-1)*10 (10)
C2: 240. (75+5)*3 (10)
Score: 73–95 (max 110)

Lesley can get a century, but Countdown is the real winner today regardless of century scores.

Round 15: E G G G E N E R A

C2 buzzes on 6 seconds to say GREENGAGE which is correct.
Final Score: 73–105 (max 120)

I'm so impressed Lesley! You were too good for him throughout and a great conundrum spot. GREENGAGE is a sweet green or greenish-yellow variety of plum. This is better than when Thatcher beat Callaghan.

[/Rihanna]

OK so this recap reads shit. I will definitely stick to being myself in next Monday's one when I will not be recapping "Reams vs Mubeen - The Decider." That is if I make it to next Monday as at present I have had chest and shoulder pains since Sunday. I'm sure I'll be fine. Mind over matter and all that...

Just before I go, I gather people like statistics, so I added some to my recap:

Statistics

• Number of people on the show who asked themselves "who is Gary Osborne?": 4
  Swear words available: 6
  Tea time teaser clues that used the word "perhaps": 1
  Number of occasions that pencam was used: 2
  Audience members left confused after Susie's Origin of Words: 38%
  Total time Jeff's eyes spent closed: 2 minutes and 17 seconds
  Number of people that died while watching today's Countdown: 2 - RIP
  Number of those that died under the age of 75: 0
  Percentage of audience that choked a chicken whilst watching today: 50%

See you in a week's time!

Ryan (and definitely not Rihanna)

Further summaries are at:
http://www.apterous.org/cdb/series.php?series=-14

Recap. Of. The year!

Ryan Taylor wrote:OK so this recap reads shit. I will definitely stick to being myself in next Monday's one when I will be recapping "Reams vs Mubeen - The Decider."

Even though, that's not on for another 3 weeks.

Next week, it's Laddiman vs. Sfyris - the kiddies' battle.

By the way, awesome recap.

James Robinson wrote:Next week, it's Laddiman vs. Sfyris - the kiddies' battle.

QFT

I move that next week's special be named mini-tot madness!

PS Will Rihanna be at COLEI on Saturday?

Even with your hilariously high standards Ryan, this was fecking awesome, topstuff

A-LOL

If recaps were to end today, I would be happy to know the last one was the BEST EVER.

Not recap of the year, post of the year.

(Warning: Goretsky-esqueness) : LOLOLOLOLOLOL

Dinos Sfyris wrote: PS Will Rihanna be at COLEI on Saturday?

I thought you were booking her??

James Robinson wrote:

Ryan Taylor wrote:OK so this recap reads shit. I will definitely stick to being myself in next Monday's one when I will be recapping "Reams vs Mubeen - The Decider."

Even though, that's not on for another 3 weeks.

Next week, it's Laddiman vs. Sfyris - the kiddies' battle.

By the way, awesome recap.

Awesome, I get to recap another special! Woop. Edited (for you James).

Three things:

A) Brilliant recap... first class. Nice use of colour, too.

B) It's Micheal, not Michael. Sorry for pointing it out, you were probably too busy painting your nails to check his name board properly.

C) I loved it when Jeff pronounced Worcester "Warchester".

D) Make that four - brilliant game today, a pleasure to watch.

Mike Brown wrote: B) It's Micheal, not Michael. Sorry for pointing it out, you were probably too busy painting your nails to check his name board properly.

Who the fuck spells their name like that?! *sigh* - edited too!

Ryan Taylor wrote:Who the fuck spells their name like that?! *sigh* - edited too!

Think it's the Gaelic spelling, although his mother probably did it just to annoy Countdown recappers many years in the future.

Oh, and it was POLICEMAN not POLICEMEN...all you can think about is men I know but just one man in uniform will do.

Mike Brown wrote:

Ryan Taylor wrote:Who the fuck spells their name like that?! *sigh* - edited too!

Think it's the Gaelic spelling, although his mother probably did it just to annoy Countdown recappers many years in the future.

Well if its the Gaelic spelling he's pronouncing his name wrong, I think its just a mis-spelled Michael

Kirk Bevins wrote:Oh, and it was POLICEMAN not POLICEMEN...all you can think about is men I know but just one man in uniform will do.

Wiki says POLICEMEN. Which is right?

Ryan Taylor wrote:

Kirk Bevins wrote:Oh, and it was POLICEMAN not POLICEMEN...all you can think about is men I know but just one man in uniform will do.

Wiki says POLICEMEN. Which is right?

Recap says POLICEMEN
Also, IIRC, Micheal declared 7 for impaler. I think that was Susie's mistake when she said you'd need another I for the 8. Or whatever.

Also, Jeff's Warchester. I tell you sisters, you wouldn't believe how many people have complained about that to me.*



*(2 or 3)

Lesley Hines wrote:Also, IIRC, Micheal declared 7 for impaler. I think that was Susie's mistake when she said you'd need another I for the 8. Or whatever.

Just watched it back, he says "I'll try an 8...not written down" then Susie says that IMPALER is there without the second I for 7.

Lol sorry - must've been nerves on the day. And the viewing. And stuff.

Fair play

Ryan Taylor wrote: Wiki says POLICEMEN. Which is right?

Haha oops. I a) misremembered and b) misheard him. I swear he said it in the singular.

Anyway, apologies darling.

You should have your own show, or at least be involved on the next podcast.

Kirk Bevins wrote:Haha oops. I a) misremembered and b) misheard him. I swear he said it in the singular.

It sounded like POLICEMAN, but then I watch with subtitles so I probably read it first (and it definitely said POLICEMAN on the subtitles) and then you're all biased when you hear it. TBH there's not much between the two pronunciation-wise.

Jon Corby wrote:

Kirk Bevins wrote:Haha oops. I a) misremembered and b) misheard him. I swear he said it in the singular.

It sounded like POLICEMAN, but then I watch with subtitles so I probably read it first (and it definitely said POLICEMAN on the subtitles) and then you're all biased when you hear it. TBH there's not much between the two pronunciation-wise.

Yeah it does sound like POLICEMAN when Jeff asks him but I checked on the wiki to be sure (forgetting to check how his name was spelt fo course)

Ryan Taylor wrote:

Jon Corby wrote:

Kirk Bevins wrote:Haha oops. I a) misremembered and b) misheard him. I swear he said it in the singular.

It sounded like POLICEMAN, but then I watch with subtitles so I probably read it first (and it definitely said POLICEMAN on the subtitles) and then you're all biased when you hear it. TBH there's not much between the two pronunciation-wise.

Yeah it does sound like POLICEMAN when Jeff asks him but I checked on the wiki to be sure (forgetting to check how his name was spelt fo course)

In conclusion, I don't think it was very clear. I think Micheal should be invited back for another show.

Actually, that reminds me - is Phill Thorne coming back this series?

I love Rihanna. Want her so much
to do every recap now.

I thought Ryan was good, but she blows
me away.

Jon Corby wrote:Actually, that reminds me - is Phill Thorne coming back this series?

I'm sure I read somewhere in another thread that he was. Can't find it at the mo, though...

Chris Corby wrote:I thought Ryan was good, but she blows
me away.

Lucky man. Don't tell Ryan - he'll be dead jealous

Brilliant, Rihanna. Best ever.

Lesley Hines wrote:

Chris Corby wrote:I thought Ryan was good, but she blows
me away.

Lucky man. Don't tell Ryan - he'll be dead jealous

Great performance Lesley. Such a pity you met Rihanna first off - you could have/should have been an octo.

Chris Corby wrote:Great performance Lesley. Such a pity you met Rihanna first off - you could have/should have been an octo.

It's awfully kind of you to say so, but credit where it's due Ryan played a blinder, and no self-respecting octochamp would ever have missed TRAINEES, or such an easy numbers *facepalm*

I can't complain: I've come out of this looking much better than I actually am, and I've got a teapot! Hurrah!!