c4countdown

Charlie Reams makes an unexpected return to Countdown today, disguised as challenger Tom Curran. Fooled nobody.

Is he related to George Raison from back in October?

Jon Corby wrote:Is he related to George Raison from back in October?

Two-thirds of George Raison's shows were in September.

Slight nit-picking I know, but you did it to me yesterday.

Jon Corby wrote:Is he related to George Raison from back in October?

Or Apterous Prune.

James Robinson wrote:

Jon Corby wrote:Is he related to George Raison from back in October?

Two-thirds of George Raison's shows were in September.

Slight nit-picking I know, but you did it to me yesterday.

Except what I said was perfectly correct, and you weren't.

Right, onto today's nitty girtty info.

Graham is now the champ after beating Jennifer yesterday.

I'm not quite convinced about how good he is, especially after missing that fairly simple numbers game early on. His letters were fairly good though, despite that phantom N in his DINGO declaration.

I wonder if Tom will despose the Curran-t champion Or not.

James Robinson wrote:I'm not quite convinced about how good he is, especially after missing that fairly simple numbers game early on.

We can't all be human calculators.........

D Eadie wrote:

James Robinson wrote:I'm not quite convinced about how good he is, especially after missing that fairly simple numbers game early on.

We can't all be human calculators.........

Based on my performances, I was more like a calculator with a couple of bugs inside.

James Robinson wrote: Based on my performances, I was more like a calculator with a couple of bugs inside.

I think you misspelled "burgers".

MEDIANTS for round 2

TONNAGES looks good on Lexplorer

1st numbers: ((100 / 2) X 7) + 6 + 5

Loved Rachel's blooper.

Surely a fleet of ships can have different TONNAGES?

Phil Reynolds wrote:Surely a fleet of ships can have different TONNAGES?

Maybe, he might be given the points later.

ANTERIOR

R9: ANTERIOR

Charlie Reams wrote:

James Robinson wrote: Based on my performances, I was more like a calculator with a couple of bugs inside.

I think you misspelled "burgers".

LMFAO

R1 DC-equaller WOOLLENS
R12 DC-beater HEIRESS

Malcolm James wrote:R1 DC-equaller WOOLLENS
R12 DC-beater HEIRESS

Yeah, my dad beat me with HEIRESS - I was quite impressed.

Does anyone else think that Graham is a dead ringer for a hobbit ?

He has a bit of a look of Elijah Wood as Frodo Baggins lol !

Mark Kudlowski wrote:Does anyone else think that Graham is a dead ringer for a hobbit ?

He has a bit of a look of Elijah Wood as Frodo Baggins lol !

I don't know, but he Mordored his opponent today.

Nice alternative for R5

(100/5 - 1) x ((6 x 2) + 7) = 361

Tom looked mortified at only getting a 5 in the 1st round, lol.

Reams didn't play to his usual standard today. It's like when you try to fare dodge when riding a train - you keep thinking "what if I get caught?", and you can't concentrate. It's never worth it.

What happened Rachel on the first numbers?

Eoin Monaghan wrote:What happened Rachel on the first numbers?

I assume that paper is attached with magnets as well, like the tiles. That would explain the four little circles in the corners. Was very funny though, and her reactions were great.

Derek Hazell wrote:

Eoin Monaghan wrote:What happened Rachel on the first numbers?

I assume that paper is attached with magnets as well, like the tiles. That would explain the four little circles in the corners. Was very funny though, and her reactions were great.

What happened though?

Eoin Monaghan wrote:What happened though?

One or more of the magnets must have slipped.
Or the board suddenly lost its magnetic polarity or something.
Better ask Dinosthechemist for a more detailed explanation.
(Yeah, I know it's closer to physics, but he still knows a lot about science)

Derek Hazell wrote:

Eoin Monaghan wrote:What happened though?

One or more of the magnets must have slipped.
Or the board suddenly lost its magnetic polarity or something.
Better ask Dinosthechemist for a more detailed explanation.
(Yeah, I know it's closer to physics, but he still knows a lot about science)

Cool, ERRATIC was there as an equaller.

The white squared numbers sheet is pinned to the board with drawing pins, onto a cork backing. It's been used repeatedly for a long while, so over time, what with all the pins going in and out, the holes have merged into one large crater and the pins no longer stick in properly, hence the sheet falling off.

Make up your own jokes.

Marc Meakin wrote:TONNAGES looks good on Lexplorer

We deliberately disallowed TONNAGES to discredit Lexplorer and all those involved in creating it.

Just waiting for Charlie to finish it completely, then we'll change dictionaries.

D Eadie wrote:The white squared numbers sheet is pinned to the board with drawing pins, onto a cork backing. It's been used repeatedly for a long while, so over time, what with all the pins going in and out, the holes have merged into one large crater and the pins no longer stick in properly, hence the sheet falling off.

Make up your own jokes.

Maybe you need some liver.

Marc Meakin wrote:

D Eadie wrote:The white squared numbers sheet is pinned to the board with drawing pins, onto a cork backing. It's been used repeatedly for a long while, so over time, what with all the pins going in and out, the holes have merged into one large crater and the pins no longer stick in properly, hence the sheet falling off.

Make up your own jokes.

Maybe you need some liver.

That's offal.

D Eadie wrote:Charlie Reams makes an unexpected return to Countdown today, disguised as challenger Tom Curran. Fooled nobody.

I thought it was Scott Mearns, having taken some kind of age-reducing serum. Unfortunately, it also seems to have sapped his Countdown ability (sorry, Tom).

Mike Brown wrote:

D Eadie wrote:Charlie Reams makes an unexpected return to Countdown today, disguised as challenger Tom Curran. Fooled nobody.

I thought it was Scott Mearns, having taken some kind of age-reducing serum. Unfortunately, it also seems to have sapped his Countdown ability (sorry, Tom).

Yeah I was surprised how poorly Tom played (sorry Tom) given he's a young male, although I suppose he picked up a bit after round 6. Probably nerves I'll bet.

Dinos Sfyris wrote:

Mike Brown wrote:

D Eadie wrote:Charlie Reams makes an unexpected return to Countdown today, disguised as challenger Tom Curran. Fooled nobody.

I thought it was Scott Mearns, having taken some kind of age-reducing serum. Unfortunately, it also seems to have sapped his Countdown ability (sorry, Tom).

Yeah I was surprised how poorly Tom played (sorry Tom) given he's a young male, although I suppose he picked up a bit after round 6. Probably nerves I'll bet.

He did seem to be seriously lacking in self-confidence and belief right from the start.

D Eadie wrote:The white squared numbers sheet is pinned to the board with drawing pins, onto a cork backing. It's been used repeatedly for a long while, so over time, what with all the pins going in and out, the holes have merged into one large crater and the pins no longer stick in properly, hence the sheet falling off.

Make up your own jokes.

Cork refusing to play ball. Nothing new there.
(Gaelic games fans will understand)

Derek Hazell wrote:It's like when you try to fare dodge when riding a train - you keep thinking "what if I get caught?", and you can't concentrate. It's never worth it.

If you do get caught you can end up with a criminal record.

Railway authorities often have a zero tolerance policy in fare dodging cases and insist on prosecuting. I've seen many aspiring solicitors, doctors and other young professionals in tears when they realise that their attempt to avoid paying 50p may have compromised their future career hopes.

Be warned. Derek is right - it's never worth it.

Philip Jarvis wrote:

Derek Hazell wrote:It's like when you try to fare dodge when riding a train - you keep thinking "what if I get caught?", and you can't concentrate. It's never worth it.

If you do get caught you can end up with a criminal record.

Railway authorities often have a zero tolerance policy in fare dodging cases and insist on prosecuting. I've seen many aspiring solicitors, doctors and other young professionals in tears when they realise that their attempt to avoid paying 50p may have compromised their future career hopes.

Be warned. Derek is right - it's never worth it.

I'm not sure this is the case. I've seen loads of people without a ticket when the inspector comes along, and normally they just pay the fare there and then. I think if they're being strict they'd charge them a penaty fare as well. The prosecution normally only happens when they don't have the money to pay so it's assumed they were fare-dodging rather than being too slow to buy a ticket.

Gavin Chipper wrote: I'm not sure this is the case. I've seen loads of people without a ticket when the inspector comes along, and normally they just pay the fare there and then. I think if they're being strict they'd charge them a penaty fare as well. The prosecution normally only happens when they don't have the money to pay so it's assumed they were fare-dodging rather than being too slow to buy a ticket.

Same. Maybe it's different on some lines but at least in my area (Cambridge/Ely/London), I've seen people be incredibly abusive to the ticket inspector and still receive nothing worse than the statutory fine. I wouldn't advise fair dodging because, as Derek says, it's just really embarrassing if you get caught, and it means you spend your journey fidgeting nervously instead of checking out the hot railway poontang.

Charlie Reams wrote:and it means you spend your journey fidgeting nervously instead of checking out the hot railway poontang.

Is that train spotter terminology?

As a kid I always dodged fairs because the lads riding the Waltzer were scary

Richard Adams wrote:As a kid I always dodged fairs because the lads riding the Waltzer were scary

I think your hilarious parody of my homophone mix-up may be slightly undermined by your own disregard for capitalisation and punctuation.

Charlie Reams wrote:

Richard Adams wrote:As a kid I always dodged fairs because the lads riding the Waltzer were scary

I think your hilarious parody of my homophone mix-up may be slightly undermined by your own disregard for capitalisation and punctuation.

That's a bit unfare.

Charlie Reams wrote:

Gavin Chipper wrote: I'm not sure this is the case. I've seen loads of people without a ticket when the inspector comes along, and normally they just pay the fare there and then. I think if they're being strict they'd charge them a penaty fare as well. The prosecution normally only happens when they don't have the money to pay so it's assumed they were fare-dodging rather than being too slow to buy a ticket.

Same. Maybe it's different on some lines but at least in my area (Cambridge/Ely/London), I've seen people be incredibly abusive to the ticket inspector and still receive nothing worse than the statutory fine. I wouldn't advise fair dodging because, as Derek says, it's just really embarrassing if you get caught, and it means you spend your journey fidgeting nervously instead of checking out the hot railway poontang.

As above. I've travelled on many many trains without a ticket, a mix of deliberately and accidentally - got away with it half the time, and of the other times I've never once been forced to pay a penalty fare or got in any trouble. Just once I was told I wasn't allowed to use my railcard for discount (fare was only a few quid anyway) and that's the worst it ever got. It does help to have the gift of gab when you do get caught, most situations can be explained away fairly innocently.

Philip Jarvis wrote:

Derek Hazell wrote:It's like when you try to fare dodge when riding a train - you keep thinking "what if I get caught?", and you can't concentrate. It's never worth it.

If you do get caught you can end up with a criminal record.

Are they giving out Susan Boyle records to fare dodgers instead of a fine now?

Matt Morrison wrote:As above. I've travelled on many many trains without a ticket, a mix of deliberately and accidentally - got away with it half the time, and of the other times I've never once been forced to pay a penalty fare or got in any trouble. Just once I was told I wasn't allowed to use my railcard for discount (fare was only a few quid anyway) and that's the worst it ever got. It does help to have the gift of gab when you do get caught, most situations can be explained away fairly innocently.

Once I bought a ticket from a machine but it didn't print the ticket, just some crappy debit card receipt which didn't really have anything on. There didn't appear to be anyone around and I was in a hurry anyway so I had to "go for it" and successfully talked my way past three separate people on my journey home. That was good.

Gavin Chipper wrote:Once I bought a ticket from a machine but it didn't print the ticket, just some crappy debit card receipt which didn't really have anything on. There didn't appear to be anyone around and I was in a hurry anyway so I had to "go for it" and successfully talked my way past three separate people on my journey home. That was good.

Have had two similar experiences:

1) I bought tickets online but collected them from the machine. The machine printed a huge pile of tickets (about 5) so I took them and left. Only when I was already at the other end did I notice that none of the tickets was actually for the return leg (they were mostly debit card things). I would've been entirely justified in fare-dodging but my home station has barriers so I had to buy another ticket. Stupid.

2) I was doing a complicated multi-part multi-day journey and explained the trip to the guy at the ticket office, who sold me a similarly complicated array of tickets. I asked explicitly if these would see me back to Cambridge, and he said yes. Of course when I checked later, they didn't, and he'd sold me a ticket which took me back to Ely but not Cambridge. In this case you have absolutely no comeback against the hopeless service provided, because there are no records of who sold it to you (and even if there were, the employee would no doubt claim that you'd asked for the wrong thing).

So now I can't really remember why I bothered relating these boring experiences, except that it irritates me that the train system threatens to treat you like a criminal for having the wrong ticket while holding itself to nothing like the same standards of precision.

Davy Affleck wrote:

Philip Jarvis wrote:

Derek Hazell wrote:It's like when you try to fare dodge when riding a train - you keep thinking "what if I get caught?", and you can't concentrate. It's never worth it.

If you do get caught you can end up with a criminal record.

Are they giving out Susan Boyle records to fare dodgers instead of a fine now?

Charlie Reams wrote:So now I can't really remember why I bothered relating these boring experiences, except that it irritates me that the train system threatens to treat you like a criminal for having the wrong ticket while holding itself to nothing like the same standards of precision.

Recently I tried to buy a ticket from a machine, and the basic journey I wanted to do was missing from the screen. It was a journey I had done a few times before, but this time there were lots of weird options but not the basic A to B one. So, as the train was coming I just got on and waited for a guy to ask on board. When he did, I explained and paid up. I then realized he has overcharged me a bit. I mentioned this at my destination station, and they made me fill in a whole A4 sheet full of small print - all for just over £4! Amazing how it suddenly becomes so difficult when it's them that are in the wrong.

Since this thread is now just a train story thread - once I accidentally bought a single instead of a return from a machine. On the way back I bought a child's single to the nearest station just to get me through the barrier, but I still ended up paying more overall. I didn't realise when I bought it that a child's ticket makes the ticket barrier beep really loudly. No-one noticed though. And I reckon I could pass for 15 at a push.

One time I bought a ticket from the machine without a hitch, travelled to my destination in a timely manner, and had my ticket accepted by the barrier on the first attempt. It was actually quite disappointing.

When I went to stay with Charlie I bought a return from York to Cambridge. It told me online that I had to change at Peterborough on the way there and on the following morning it told me to change at Stevenage, then Peterborough, then York. Of course on the return journey I was actually going to exit the station at Peterborough and go to the Scrabble tournament. This ticket cost me just over £44 with a railcard. I got to the station, asked for the relevant ticket and set off on my journey, however, on the ticket it had "Route: Ely". This was fine on the way as changing at Peterborough and going to Cambridge passes through Ely, but what about on the way back? Being an inquisitive type I asked the train manager if my return journey, changing at Stevenage then Peterborough, would be valid with this ticket. "You don't have to change at Ely, just go through it, so yes it's valid sir." I don't think he understood so I rephrased the question as follows: "My railway geography isn't too good down this part of the world - in the morning the internet has told me to go Cambridge - Stevenage, Stevenage - Peterborough. Does this go through Ely?" Yes was the reply.

Next morning with Charlie I got on my train and immediately I smelt a rat...it was a class 365 which I'm sure don't go through Ely. Charlie's ticket also said "route Ely". He decided to run off and ask someone if his ticket would be valid --- it turned out it wouldn't (and the first one via Ely was gone 10am, the time we needed to be in Peterborough!) so he bought another ticket. I'm sat here with my £44 ticket which the internet and the train manager on Crosscountry told me would be fine and I'm told this train doesn't go via Ely. I wasn't going to by another ticket out of principle.

Anyway nobody came to check the tickets on either route so Charlie ended up spending twice as much as he should have and I got away with it. A stupid system to state "via Ely" on the ticket though, particularly if people don't know the railway geography! They want to go from A to B and since the internet said it was a valid route, who is to say it goes through Ely or not?!

Kirk Bevins wrote:He decided to run off and ask someone if his ticket would be valid --- it turned out it wouldn't (and the first one via Ely was gone 10am, the time we needed to be in Peterborough!) so he bought another ticket.

Worst £8 I ever spent

Charlie Reams wrote:

Kirk Bevins wrote:He decided to run off and ask someone if his ticket would be valid --- it turned out it wouldn't (and the first one via Ely was gone 10am, the time we needed to be in Peterborough!) so he bought another ticket.

Worst £8 I ever spent

Please tell me you got a refund. I had presumed you did, as in the second of your previous two stories you mentioned how you had no leg to stand on in being able to prove the inadequacy of the staff member who fucked up your tickets, which silently suggested to me that you had successfully got your refund sorted for the first story?

I'd like to offer a tip for planning rail journeys:

The most accurate online journey planner appears to be National Rail Enquiries.

Because it has to cater for all people, however, it incorporates some rather pessimistic transfer times on journeys where a change of train (or tube) is required. For instance, if I found myself at St John's (just south of London Bridge) and needed to go to Watford (Watford Junction station), journey planner would tell me the following:

SAJ dep 1538
LBG arr 1546
It then allows 48 minutes for the tube journey to Euston
EUS dep 1634
WFJ arr 1654

However, the tube journey LBG to EUS takes only 12 minutes (source: TfL) so, with there being five trains an hour EUS-WFJ, it's often possible to take a chunk out of the journey time. I think 48 minutes might be to allow for clueless and/or obese tourists. I don't want to rattle any cages, so I won't say which particular nationality I'm thinking of.

For longer journeys, similar time savings can be made if you break up the journey and check the train times for each section. Do the full journey first and make a note of which major stations the different options tend to go through and where they require changing. Then see if any connection times are a bit generous. Again in London, the change time between St Pancras Domestic and St Pancras International is 10 minutes. They're in the same building! It takes 1 minute (if you know where you're going).

Alec Rivers wrote: Again in London, the change time between St Pancras Domestic and St Pancras International is 10 minutes. They're in the same building! It takes 1 minute (if you know where you're going).

On the other hand you're likely to need the full 10 minutes from the tube station, as there's a huge shopping mall to trek through after reaching surface level