Is modern life bad for society

[Marc Meakin]

Had my first Uber ride yesterday and was chatting to my driver about mental health and how modern society today means that kids don't play out as they are on their computers and games consoles.
Couple that with 2 years of covid and lockdown and it means isolation is continuing with the growth of deliveroo and home shopping people arnt going out.
Adults are slaves to their phones and flirting is dying as the me too movement has made flirtatious behaviour a minefield.
I dont know if mental health issues are on the rise or if knowledge of mental health issues are in the spotlight more.
I genuinely feel that people are being manipulated by algorithms and future elections will be won by who controls the media best.
There is a school of thought that the Brexit referendum was the first time media manipulation was used.

[Elliott Mellor]

...and flirting is dying as the me too movement has made flirtatious behaviour a minefield.

Speak for yourself...

[Gavin Chipper]

Modern life is bad for society, but this goes back centuries, arguably millennia. It's not just now.

In our evolutionary past, we'd all live in big groups that were also largely egalitarian. These groups would have been people's social groups that they spent all their time with. Nowadays, people live with the same three or four people that they may or may not get on with, or sometimes even alone, and this isn't really healthy. People are far more isolated now and have far more disjoint social lives. It's not what we evolved for and it can have serious psychological effects.

Also, back in the past, the work people did was directly relevant to them. They worked for their own survival and that of the group, which got them food and shelter and enabled them to get on with the important things in life - hanging out with the guys. Now we're just wage slaves, often doing completely mundane stuff that we have no interest in, in exchange for these tokens that allow us to take part in this wider nebulous entity known as "the economy".

This is not to say that all aspects of modern life are bad, but no serious measures have ever been in place to fix the main things that are wrong with it.

[Ian Volante]

...and flirting is dying as the me too movement has made flirtatious behaviour a minefield.

If the #metoo movement, which highlights sexual harassment and worse, is causing problems for you when you flirt, you maybe need to recalibrate how you go about it?

As for the wider points, humans are adapting to a fast-changing world, and humans aren't very good at change, when traditional and culture build up over many years but need to be quickly adapted, it can take a long period for ingrained social habits to catch up.

[Fiona T]

...and flirting is dying as the me too movement has made flirtatious behaviour a minefield.

If the #metoo movement, which highlights sexual harassment and worse, is causing problems for you when you flirt, you maybe need to recalibrate how you go about it?

I am intrigued by this - can you give examples of flirtatious behaviour that you can no longer indulge in?

Having said that, I'm terrible at flirting!

[Marc Meakin]

...and flirting is dying as the me too movement has made flirtatious behaviour a minefield.

If the #metoo movement, which highlights sexual harassment and worse, is causing problems for you when you flirt, you maybe need to recalibrate how you go about it?

I am intrigued by this - can you give examples of flirtatious behaviour that you can no longer indulge in?

Having said that, I'm terrible at flirting!

I'm happily coupled so I'm past flirtatious behaviour.
I was referring to the younger generation, not just incels

But i should add what counted as banter once upon a time could be classed as sexual harassment now.
Calling someone dear or darling was once a term of endearment.
Nowadays with unconscious bias I won't hold a door open or offer my seat to a woman or lift heavier items to help my female colleagues

[Fiona T]

If the #metoo movement, which highlights sexual harassment and worse, is causing problems for you when you flirt, you maybe need to recalibrate how you go about it?

I am intrigued by this - can you give examples of flirtatious behaviour that you can no longer indulge in?

Having said that, I'm terrible at flirting!

I'm happily coupled so I'm past flirtatious behaviour.
I was referring to the younger generation, not just incels

But i should add what counted as banter once upon a time could be classed as sexual harassment now.
Calling someone dear or darling was once a term of endearment.
Nowadays with unconscious bias I won't hold a door open or offer my seat to a woman or lift heavier items to help my female colleagues

Well I hardly think holding an door open would be classed as sexual harassment - I do it all the time. As far as lifting heavier items, "would you like a hand with that?" is never gonna cause offence!

[Marc Meakin]

I am intrigued by this - can you give examples of flirtatious behaviour that you can no longer indulge in?

Having said that, I'm terrible at flirting!

I'm happily coupled so I'm past flirtatious behaviour.
I was referring to the younger generation, not just incels

But i should add what counted as banter once upon a time could be classed as sexual harassment now.
Calling someone dear or darling was once a term of endearment.
Nowadays with unconscious bias I won't hold a door open or offer my seat to a woman or lift heavier items to help my female colleagues

Well I hardly think holding an door open would be classed as sexual harassment - I do it all the time. As far as lifting heavier items, "would you like a hand with that?" is never gonna cause offence!

I was conflating sexual harassment with unconscious bias

[Callum Todd]

To strike a middle ground, as a young single heterosexual man in the age of MeToo, I have noticed over the past decade my understanding of women's experience when interacting with men has evolved. It's hard to be sure whether that's because of public narrative or just generally growing up and becoming wiser and more thoughtful, but I think hearing women's voices in public media on this topic has increased my awareness of their experience, and has consequently altered my behaviour on some occasions.

So it's not as simple as 'MeToo has killed flirting' vs. 'only sexpests have anything to learn from it'. I think most ordinary men might have had their eyes opened to the experience of women a bit more in the past decade, and hopefully might have become more considerate in their behaviour around and towards women as a result.

[Mark James]

I started going to counselling a few months ago and it's been great. I learned about a thing called Attachment Theory. I think it should be taught in school. I think it will help anyone who has struggled with relationships. And I would recommend therapy to anyone who can afford it if they are struggling with modern life. The problem with modern life is obviously capitalism but that's probably not going to be solved in our lifetime so do what you can in the meantime to look after yourself and (channeling my inner Jerry Springer) each other.

[Marc Meakin]

I started going to counselling a few months ago and it's been great. I learned about a thing called Attachment Theory. I think it should be taught in school. I think it will help anyone who has struggled with relationships. And I would recommend therapy to anyone who can afford it if they are struggling with modern life. The problem with modern life is obviously capitalism but that's probably not going to be solved in our lifetime so do what you can in the meantime to look after yourself and (channeling my inner Jerry Springer) each other.

I do worry that the attachment theory is creating more and more children with mental health issues.
How many times do I see a young mum pushing her baby with one eye on her phone, couple that with plonking a child in front of a device or TV to amuse itself with little or no interaction and this can be a slippery slope