Mondegreens

[Mark Deeks]

You're The One That I Want, beginning at the 2 minute mark:

If you're filled with affection,
You're to shy to convey,
Betta take my direction.

And not, as I thought:

If you're filled with affection,
You're to shy to convey,
Maintain my erection

[Marc Meakin]

That's what happens when you think about it too hard

[Marc Meakin]

The one that used to get me was the opening line of Big Mouth Strikes Again by the Smiths
Sweetness, sweetness, I was only joking when I said I'd like to smash a greeters in your head
instead of every tooth in your head

[Mark James]

So I just found out today that there is speculation that Yanis Varoufakis' wife is the subject of Pulp's Common People. In finding this out I also came across someone who thought the lyric was "She came from Greece she had a thirst for Norwich".

[Jon O'Neill]

The Black Keys - Gotta Get Away

"I went from Xanadu to Kalamazoo"
Apparently it's San Berdoo.

[Fred Mumford]

I remember my disappointment when I realised that the lyric in Creeque Alley about who is sat in the coffee shop is really (John) "Sebastian" rather than "the bastards".

[Marc Meakin]

Apart from the obvious Sue Lawley /So Lonely mondegreen The Police have another one.
In Message in a Bottle, I hear the lyric A year has passed since I broke my nose instead of the more obvious wrote my note

[Fiona T]

Howard Jones - New Song

Shout out to the menopausal ladies - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9fjg7N_mGaU&t=61s

"Throw off your menstrual chains"

(good excuse for a bit of 80s pop - I had a Howard Jones haircut when I was 15 )

[Adam Gillard]

I couldn't figure out the dance move my 4-year-old was doing to Black Lace's Superman until she explained she'd heard the instruction as "hit your eye" instead of "hitch a ride".

[Marc Meakin]

In the song Freed From Desire by Gala Rizatta she sings
"My love has got no money he's go his Trombalise"

[Mark James]

I thought the line "you know I like to keep my cheeks dry today" in Blind Melon's no rain was "you know I like to keep my cheating strategy". Also in the Clash's Rock the Casbah I used to think Sharlene didn't like it.

Twitter has added auto generated subtitles on videos and it's often hilariously wrong. Someone posted the video for Rock the Casbah and the subtitles said Rocking the Taskbar.