Virtual Mars bars
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- Phil Reynolds
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Virtual Mars bars
Having been absent from the world of online forums for a while before I joined C4C late last year, I've been surprised and amused to find that a (usually non-existent) Mars bar is still the de rigueur prize on offer for any casually thrown-out challenge. Surprised because I thought it would have died out by now; amused because I believe, unless and until anyone comes up with convincing evidence to the contrary, that I originated the habit.
In around 1990 I was employed by a large telecommunications company which had what would now be known as an intranet, complete with online forums. One particular forum to which I was a regular contributor became something of a cult, and after it had been going for a while its members - many of whom only knew each other via their online personas - decided it was time we all met up for a lunchtime beer or three to find out what we all looked like (this was before the days of avatars - it was a purely textual system).
A date was set and, to encourage attendance, I set a competition for which the prizes would be given out at the gathering. The prizes were all Fun Size Mars Bars, which was a personal in-joke. (Ben Elton had recently performed a routine on one of his TV shows about the social embarrassment experienced by British men finding themselves on a naturist beach when on holiday, in which he used the term "Fun Size Mars Bar" to refer to the masculine sexual appendage; and it appealed to my puerile sense of humour to innocently announce that I would be giving these away as prizes and wait to see if anyone picked up on the allusion.)
After that it became commonplace on the forum for anyone posing a question to add, "FSMB to anyone who can provide the answer," even though the offer was generally more honoured in the breach than in the observance. Often the abbreviation was extended to VFSMB (for virtual FSMB) to acknowledge this. Sometimes, if a problem was thought to be particularly intractable, the reward would be a KSMB or King Size Mars bar.
Many of the regulars on that forum were also influential in a number of public forums and newsgroups, particularly in the area of UNIX standards, ANSI C/C++, OOP and other geek-heavy zones. By around 1994 (which was the last time I attended a major international UNIX Users Group conference), the virtual Mars had gained considerably wider currency.
So there you go. It may all just be coincidence, but unless anyone knows of an alternative provenance, I do believe that posts such as this one would not be the same without me. It's not much of a claim to fame, but it's all I've got.
In around 1990 I was employed by a large telecommunications company which had what would now be known as an intranet, complete with online forums. One particular forum to which I was a regular contributor became something of a cult, and after it had been going for a while its members - many of whom only knew each other via their online personas - decided it was time we all met up for a lunchtime beer or three to find out what we all looked like (this was before the days of avatars - it was a purely textual system).
A date was set and, to encourage attendance, I set a competition for which the prizes would be given out at the gathering. The prizes were all Fun Size Mars Bars, which was a personal in-joke. (Ben Elton had recently performed a routine on one of his TV shows about the social embarrassment experienced by British men finding themselves on a naturist beach when on holiday, in which he used the term "Fun Size Mars Bar" to refer to the masculine sexual appendage; and it appealed to my puerile sense of humour to innocently announce that I would be giving these away as prizes and wait to see if anyone picked up on the allusion.)
After that it became commonplace on the forum for anyone posing a question to add, "FSMB to anyone who can provide the answer," even though the offer was generally more honoured in the breach than in the observance. Often the abbreviation was extended to VFSMB (for virtual FSMB) to acknowledge this. Sometimes, if a problem was thought to be particularly intractable, the reward would be a KSMB or King Size Mars bar.
Many of the regulars on that forum were also influential in a number of public forums and newsgroups, particularly in the area of UNIX standards, ANSI C/C++, OOP and other geek-heavy zones. By around 1994 (which was the last time I attended a major international UNIX Users Group conference), the virtual Mars had gained considerably wider currency.
So there you go. It may all just be coincidence, but unless anyone knows of an alternative provenance, I do believe that posts such as this one would not be the same without me. It's not much of a claim to fame, but it's all I've got.
- Charlie Reams
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Re: Virtual Mars bars
Is there an online archive of this message board? Can we see the birth of an era?
Also I personally got the idea of giving away a Mars bar from my house master at junior school, which was certainly after 1990 but it seems unlikely that a man of that age at that time was aware of an Internet meme.
Also I personally got the idea of giving away a Mars bar from my house master at junior school, which was certainly after 1990 but it seems unlikely that a man of that age at that time was aware of an Internet meme.
- Michael Wallace
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Re: Virtual Mars bars
I'm afraid I'm not especially convinced - I think it's just a small, cheap, universally-known and (fairly) universally liked thing. Several teachers at my school awarded Mars bars for various achievements, for instance.
- Phil Reynolds
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Re: Virtual Mars bars
Alas no. I think it all got wiped by our IT department when someone discovered how much fun we'd all been having and things got ugly. (Seriously - disciplinary action and even one or two sackings ensued.)Charlie Reams wrote:Is there an online archive of this message board? Can we see the birth of an era?
The damp hissing noise you hear is the sound of your piss landing on my bonfire.Also I personally got the idea of giving away a Mars bar from my house master at junior school, which was certainly after 1990 but it seems unlikely that a man of that age at that time was aware of an Internet meme.
- Michael Wallace
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Re: Virtual Mars bars
Perverts, the lot of you.Phil Reynolds wrote:The damp hissing noise you hear is the sound of your piss landing on my bonfire.
Re: Virtual Mars bars
50p and a packet of Rolos, that's my prize of choice.
- Phil Reynolds
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Re: Virtual Mars bars
Is that what the priest used to give you?Gary Male wrote:50p and a packet of Rolos, that's my prize of choice.
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Re: Virtual Mars bars
I think you are overlooking the fact that Mick Jagger was allegedly given the prize of a Mars Bar by Marianne Faithfull at a party in the 1960's..................
- Phil Reynolds
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Re: Virtual Mars bars
All of you are talking about real Mars bars. My contention is that I invented the virtual Mars bar. So up yours. (As Marianne said to Mick.)
Re: Virtual Mars bars
I believe you, Phil!
Apropos of nothing very much: my eldest calls them comically undersized bars.
Apropos of nothing very much: my eldest calls them comically undersized bars.
"My idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with me." Benjamin Disraeli
- Phil Reynolds
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Re: Virtual Mars bars
Any other claims to fame of doubtful provenance and even more dubious merit? Actually, I have another one: my middle names are the forename and surname respectively of an ancestor of mine - a famous 17th century Welsh metaphysical poet.
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Re: Virtual Mars bars
Nothing famous but at school I invented a long thin character called Lanky Larry for a piece of homework about eating healthily. About a year later at the school tuck shop I discovered a confectionery of the same name with a picture of a very striking resemblance to my creation, furthering sales of sugary snacks that he was initially meant to discourage
- Phil Reynolds
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Re: Virtual Mars bars
Wow. That can't have been a coincidence, surely?Dinos Sfyris wrote:Nothing famous but at school I invented a long thin character called Lanky Larry for a piece of homework about eating healthily. About a year later at the school tuck shop I discovered a confectionery of the same name with a picture of a very striking resemblance to my creation, furthering sales of sugary snacks that he was initially meant to discourage
And here it is:
Looks like a nightmare cross between Charlie and Sideshow Bob.
- Martin Gardner
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Re: Virtual Mars bars
I can't imagine there are many 17th Century Welsh metaphysical poets who are really *that* famous.Phil Reynolds wrote:Any other claims to fame of doubtful provenance and even more dubious merit? Actually, I have another one: my middle names are the forename and surname respectively of an ancestor of mine - a famous 17th century Welsh metaphysical poet.
If you cut a gandiseeg in half, do you get two gandiseegs or two halves of a gandiseeg?
- Phil Reynolds
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Re: Virtual Mars bars
You're probably right. Hold on, I'll just count them. Er, 1, ...Martin Gardner wrote:I can't imagine there are many 17th Century Welsh metaphysical poets who are really *that* famous.Phil Reynolds wrote:my middle names are the forename and surname respectively of an ancestor of mine - a famous 17th century Welsh metaphysical poet.
- Matt Morrison
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Re: Virtual Mars bars
Surely that's an even better claim. Your ancestor is the ONLY famous 17th century Welsh metaphysical poet EVER.Phil Reynolds wrote:You're probably right. Hold on, I'll just count them. Er, 1, ...Martin Gardner wrote:I can't imagine there are many 17th Century Welsh metaphysical poets who are really *that* famous.Phil Reynolds wrote:my middle names are the forename and surname respectively of an ancestor of mine - a famous 17th century Welsh metaphysical poet.
- Phil Reynolds
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Re: Virtual Mars bars
Actually, according to Wikipedia, the term "metaphysical poet" refers to a specific small group of British lyric poets of the early 17th century (rather shamefully, I didn't know this), so the qualification "17th century" in my claim is redundant.Matt Morrison wrote:Surely that's an even better claim. Your ancestor is the ONLY famous 17th century Welsh metaphysical poet EVER.
- Kai Laddiman
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Re: Virtual Mars bars
As you are for suggesting such a preposterous idea as a VFSMB. What's wrong with NFSMB?Phil Reynolds wrote:the qualification "17th century" in my claim is redundant
16/10/2007 - Episode 4460
Dinos Sfyris 76 - 78 Dorian Lidell
Proof that even idiots can get well and truly mainwheeled.
Dinos Sfyris 76 - 78 Dorian Lidell
Proof that even idiots can get well and truly mainwheeled.
- Phil Reynolds
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Re: Virtual Mars bars
Kai Laddiman wrote:NFSMB
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Re: Virtual Mars bars
I guess Kai would prefer a Non-virtual FSMB. I don't blame him. Though personally I prefer Aeroes.Phil Reynolds wrote:Kai Laddiman wrote:NFSMB
- Kai Laddiman
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Re: Virtual Mars bars
Normal Fun-Size Mars Bar.
16/10/2007 - Episode 4460
Dinos Sfyris 76 - 78 Dorian Lidell
Proof that even idiots can get well and truly mainwheeled.
Dinos Sfyris 76 - 78 Dorian Lidell
Proof that even idiots can get well and truly mainwheeled.