Weetabix

[Michael Wallace]

Acacia? I barely know 'er!

[JimBentley]

Anyway, all this Weetabix talk reminded me that I occasionally go through phases of eating loads of Weetabix (certainly more than 4 a day), so I thought I'd get some the other day. Being a fucking cheapskate, I got Tesco Value Wheat Biscuits (about 70p for 36) and on first glance they're obviously pretty low-grade - a little bit smaller than regular Weetabix and just roughly shaped into blocks, rather than being a uniform shape. And normal Weetabix seem much more compressed, so might have more in them. All that said though, they tasted pretty much identical (i.e. nice).

As for this milk problem, I couldn't give a shit as I think they taste good dry, semi-dry or soggy. IT IS ALL GOOD.

[Ryan Taylor]

Also since I haven't had Weetabix since like forever, I'm going to put them on my shopping list on Sunday and actually have them again and then I can feel part of this discussion rather than having to butt in and slag off the middle class.

[Michael Wallace]

Also since I haven't had Weetabix since like forever, I'm going to put them on my shopping list on Sunday and actually have them again and then I can feel part of this discussion rather than having to butt in and slag off the middle class.

Let us know how they go with chip spice. Freak.

Edited because I fucking wrote chip sauce instead of spice because it's clearly made up anyway.

[Ryan Taylor]

Also since I haven't had Weetabix since like forever, I'm going to put them on my shopping list on Sunday and actually have them again and then I can feel part of this discussion rather than having to butt in and slag off the middle class.

Let us know how they go with chip spice. Freak.

Edited because I fucking wrote chip sauce instead of spice because it's clearly made up anyway.

Haha! Seriously I think you're all freaks for never having chip spice before. It's just standard round here, you ask for chips at a takeaway and they pretty much put the chip spice on without asking, it's that common! Please obtain some chip spice from somewhere and I promise you it will disappoint.

[JimBentley]

Haha! Seriously I think you're all freaks for never having chip spice before. It's just standard round here, you ask for chips at a takeaway and they pretty much put the chip spice on without asking, it's that common! Please obtain some chip spice from somewhere and I promise you it will disappoint.

It's just one of these local things though innit, every region has them. Like every single burger or pizza place round here (Teesside) does parmos, but I've never seen them anywhere else and even people as close as Newcastle won't know what they are.

[Ryan Taylor]

Haha! Seriously I think you're all freaks for never having chip spice before. It's just standard round here, you ask for chips at a takeaway and they pretty much put the chip spice on without asking, it's that common! Please obtain some chip spice from somewhere and I promise you it will disappoint.

It's just one of these local things though innit, every region has them. Like every single burger or pizza place round here (Teesside) does parmos, but I've never seen them anywhere else and even people as close as Newcastle won't know what they are.

True. We don't have parmos in Hull at all. Weirdo.

[Charlie Reams]

I need more information about chip spice so that I might prepare my own.

[Ian Volante]

Another one is Edinburgh brown sauce (standard question the chippy: "salt and sauce?"), although I think that's wider than just this city.

[Martin Bishop]

The Weetabix FAQ recommends that you don't eat more than 4 'bix a day. So now you know.

There's a weetabix FAQ? That's amazing.

[Jon Corby]

Please obtain some chip spice from somewhere and I promise you it will disappoint.

Even if we have really low expectations anyway? Sounds great.

[Ryan Taylor]

Please obtain some chip spice from somewhere and I promise you it will disappoint.

Even if we have really low expectations anyway? Sounds great.

Haha. Classic. (I've just watched 'The Hangover' again). Clearly I meant to put **not**.

[Matt Morrison]

a) Ryan - I've asked you to bring chip spice to Colin. I'm serious, and I'll be seriously disappointed if you don't.
b) Jim - parmos? And you should be touched I'm asking you rather than looking it up myself, like I did for Ryan slash chip spice. If likeable-sounding, I may also ask you to bring some to Colin.

[Mike Brown]

a) Ryan - I've asked you to bring chip spice to Colin. I'm serious, and I'll be seriously disappointed if you don't.
b) Jim - parmos? And you should be touched I'm asking you rather than looking it up myself, like I did for Ryan slash chip spice. If likeable-sounding, I may also ask you to bring some to Colin.

Just checked out http://www.chipspice.co.uk and it sounds very exciting; not sure about a product that has monosodium glutamate as its second ingredient, though...

[Kai Laddiman]

One of my Countdown opponents (Gary McInerny or something I think his name was?) had orange juice on his cornflakes instead of milk.

We used to get Oatibix Bitesize Sultana and Apple, which goes brilliantly with orange juice.

[Ryan Taylor]

Coincidence?



I think this thread now needs a poll kind of like the Creme Egg "how do you eat yours?" thing.

[Soph K]

It's simple: eat the first Weetabix quite quickly then get how many more you want, and eat those fairly quickly!! That's what I do! In fact, I had one this morning and I didn't eat it fast enough, and it was all mushy! You are right, when it's mushy it's so disgusting!!



Enjoy Weetabix-Eating-Without-Mushiness!

[Lesley Hines]

not sure about a product that has monosodium glutamate as its second ingredient, though...

So do chinese takeaways and it doesn't seem to spoil them any

[Mike Brown]

not sure about a product that has monosodium glutamate as its second ingredient, though...

So do chinese takeaways and it doesn't seem to spoil them any

True... wonder what they'd taste like without it? Pretty good, but not quite as nice, I suspect. Seem to remember it's all to do with umami.

[Ryan Taylor]

So I went out this morning and bought some Weetabix for the first time in like forever. I'd forgotten how they are packaged until I opened the box (I half expected them to be just loose and you could tip them out like with most cereal). Anyway I fobbed off all these shit ideas on how to best have Weetabix (with fruit? standing them on the thin side? with cheese? AND port?) and just poured on quite a lot of milk on my 3 biscuits and microwaved for a minute. Then I checked and they weren't very warm so I microwaved for another minute which was probably a bit too long. Basically, the two biscuits underneath had permanently disfigured and were just mixed in with the milk and the top one had collapsed inwards and looked a little tanned. I squeezed some treacle onto them and enjoyed. I'd forgotten what they tasted like really but when I finally had them it brought back memories of when I would wake up at 6:15am in my Power Ranger pyjamas and watch 'All Clued Up' at 6:30am (wow, how fucking awesome was that show?) before getting ready for primary school and putting on my elasticated tie whilst mother was making the packed lunches for the family. Great memories just from having tasted weetabix for the first time since my last phase.

In summary, the best way to eat weetabix is just pile on some milk (however much you want) heat it up until it's piping hot and then treacle it up.

[Jon Corby]

my Power Ranger pyjamas

I really hope you're wearing these Saturday night.

[Ryan Taylor]

my Power Ranger pyjamas

I really hope you're wearing these Saturday night.

I do still wear pyjamas and I think I still have two pairs of Simpson ones. However my mum got me some new pyjamas for Christmas (hooray) and you can tell just how well my mother knows me...not. I'll bring them ones.

[Ryan Taylor]

So what is weetabix chocolate like?

[Michael Wallace]

So, a couple of weeks ago I sent Weetabix a letter to get to the bottom of some of the questions raised in this thread. Here's what I wrote:

I am afraid I am having great difficulty with my Weetabix. In short, whenever I make some it is always either too mushy, or completely dry in the middle, and I don't know where I'm going wrong. I have tried using the recommended quantity of milk straight into the bowl, but this is then absorbed by the biscuits from the base upwards, which results in soggy bottoms and dry tops. Pouring the milk directly on top of the biscuits risks dangerous splashage, and often results in the milk simply running off the top and soaking the bottoms again!

I have discussed this at great length with friends and colleagues, all of whom have suggested various ways in which to achieve a perfect Weetabix Milk Moisture Mix (or Weetabix MMM, for short). I have tried standing them on their edges, on top of each other, square bowls, circular bowls, only having one biscuit 'in play' at a time, and so on. Some methods have better success rates than others, and whilst a slow drip of milk tends to produce better results, it is incredibly inefficient in terms of my (obviously valuable) time.

I thought, therefore, that I could turn to you for some definitive guidance. How do the makers of Weetabix recommend one should combine milk and biscuit? Of course, I appreciate that successful Weetabix consumption is more of an art than a science, and that it presumably takes years of practice to achieve tasty whole grain nirvana, but if you have any tips they'd be most gratefully received.

Thanks, and regards,

Michael Wallace

P.S. One more thing – what is the plural of Weetabix? Weetabix, Weetabodes, Weetabices or Weetabixes? I have heard all in common use.

I'll post their reply in the next post, so you can take all this in.

[Charlie Reams]

it is incredibly inefficient in terms of my (obviously valuable) time.

Excellent.

[Michael Wallace]

So. I didn't hear anything for a couple of weeks, and started to worry I'd been a bit too mental to get a reply. (No matter, I had a follow-up letter planned just in case.) But then this morning a Mysterious Envelope came through the door! And inside...

Dear Mr Wallace

Many thanks for your letter regarding Weetabix.

I am tempted to say the amount of milk required and method in which it is applied is really a case of trial and error but you seem to have exhausted most possibilities!

In the end though it really is down to personal preference. I place two Weetabix side by side and barely cover the bottom half in cold milk. We know that others completely cover the biscuits. Some use hot milk, some us them as a biscuit base, like a cream cracker, topped with cheese and savoury snacks. Such is the versatility of Britain's favourite breakfast cereal!

You will see from the enclosed there are many ways to enjoy Weetabix. Perhaps we can entice you to try some of these serving suggestions?

Finally, the question of pluralisation. In fact, the plural of Weetabix is Weetabix. Like fish and sheep, the singular and plural are the same.

We hope this helps!

Thanks again for getting in touch.

Yours sincerely,

Paul Blomley
Consumer Services Manager

So in summary: they don't know how to eat them either, and they think you have fish and sheep, not fish and chips. But they did send me a £1 voucher for Weetabix, so all's good

[Jon O'Neill]

Amazing, great response. Going to eat more Weetabix now.

[Michael Wallace]

Just had a proper look at the serving suggestions for Weetabix they sent with it. "Plain with milk" is apparently only number 18, but this is my favourite:

[Matt Morrison]

Yeah, I also like how they always mention "for a treat!" when it involves chocolate bits

Great letter by the way, I'd be proud of that one.

[Gavin Chipper]

Yeah, good work. "Weetabixen" is another possible plural that I don't think was mentioned.

[Michael Wallace]

Spent my £1 on some Chocolate Weetabix. Report tomorrow if I cba to go out and get some milk.

[Chris Corby]

Spent my £1 on some Chocolate Weetabix. Report tomorrow if I cba to go out and get some milk.

.......er, how much longer do we have to wait for an update? Is this a cereal?

[Michael Wallace]

Spent my £1 on some Chocolate Weetabix. Report tomorrow if I cba to go out and get some milk.

.......er, how much longer do we have to wait for an update? Is this a cereal?

Oh right, sorry. I got distracted by the excitement of chocolate Weetabix. It is a cereal yes, and it's basically like regular Weetabix (complete with sogginess), but with bonus chocolate. Not really convinced.

[Ryan Taylor]

I had Sainsbury basics weetabix today. They are square and a little bit smaller meaning I had 4 instead of 3 but they tasted the same as Weetabix despite being miles cheaper. I found that they were really absorbent too.

[Kathleen Batlle]

I eat my weetabix in a completely different way to everyone else, by the looks of things .... In the bowl I put two weetabix side by side, then a small layer of traditional allbran and on top a layer of cornflakes. Gently pour over a good amount of ice cold skimmed milk, no sugar nor honey. The cornflakes keep the whole dish crunchy and the coarseness of the allbran compliments the sogginess of the weetabix at the bottom. Delicious!!!