The fantastic Jeff Stelling

Percy Round · Post by **Percy Round** » Mon Jul 20, 2009 4:51 pm

I am sick of hearing Jeff Stelling using the word "fantastic" whenever he thinks something is very good, excellent, remarkable, praiseworthy and many other adjectives. I lost count of the number of times he said it on Friday's (17/07/2009) programme, but at the end, he said it four times in the space of a minute. He uses it as some ignorant people use the other all-embracing f... word by applying it to anything good, bad or indifferent. Does he not have a very extensive vocabulary?

Charlie Reams · Post by **Charlie Reams** » Mon Jul 20, 2009 5:11 pm

Fantastic post, Percy.

Michael Wallace · Post by **Michael Wallace** » Mon Jul 20, 2009 5:11 pm

Do you know Stuart Earl? I think you'd get on...

Marc Meakin · Post by **Marc Meakin** » Mon Jul 20, 2009 5:16 pm

Unbelievable Jeff

Maybe he needs to take a leaf out of Jim Bowens book 'Smashing,great, super'

Matt Morrison · Post by **Matt Morrison** » Mon Jul 20, 2009 5:26 pm

Fantastic is the new nice.

Michael Wallace · Post by **Michael Wallace** » Mon Jul 20, 2009 5:31 pm

Matt Morrison wrote:Fantastic is the new nice.

I had a teacher at primary school who would give you a detention if, during the course of the year, you used the word 'nice' 10 times in your work. I got her a packet of Nice biscuits as a leaving present.

Percy Round · Post by **Percy Round** » Mon Jul 20, 2009 5:38 pm

Nice one Matt!

Percy Round · Post by **Percy Round** » Mon Jul 20, 2009 5:42 pm

Well, at least Jim Bowen has three words meaning the same thing, Marc. Jeff has only one

David Roe · Post by **David Roe** » Tue Jul 21, 2009 9:40 am

"Super, smashing, great" only counts as one word the way Jim Bowen says it.

Percy Round · Post by **Percy Round** » Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:06 am

With regard to your primary school teacher's attitude to "nice", Michael, this story may make you smile.
A primary school teacher asked her class to make up a sentence using the same word twice, but attached to different words. She said, "I'll give you an example - 'The important lady said arithmetic was important.' Do you understand?" Chorus of, "Yes, Miss." Right", she said, the first word is 'nice'." A little girl raised her hand and said, "It was a nice day, so we went for a nice walk." "Very good, Angela", said the teacher.
Now, the next word is 'charming'." After a long pause, a boy raised his hand and said, "My sister came home from work yesterday and said she was pregnant. My dad said, "Oh, charming: bloody charming."

James Robinson · Post by **James Robinson** » Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:22 am

Percy, is there really anything that annoying about a harmless 9-letter word.

There are obviously some catchphrases, like possibly the Jim Bowen one that everyone seems to be mentioning, that can be annoying if repeated all the time, but it's just an expressive word which Jeff obviously likes to say a lot.

Surely, everyone has a word that they say all the time, if they can't think of anything else

Frankly, it doesn't bother me personally.

Ian Dent · Post by **Ian Dent** » Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:32 am

Hi James,

Why do you not use Apterous?

Matt Morrison · Post by **Matt Morrison** » Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:36 am

James Robinson wrote:Percy, is there really anything that annoying about a harmless 9-letter word.

James, is there really anything that annoying about constantly using brightly coloured text at inappropriate times?

Yes, yes there is.

James Robinson · Post by **James Robinson** » Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:46 am

Ian Dent wrote:Hi James,

Why do you not use Apterous?

Well Ian, the simple answer is I've just never got round to applying on it.

I clearly seem to be missing out on all the action, aren't I?

I definitely need to be on it ASAP.

EDIT: I know that sounds like a ridiculous answer, but if you knew me, then you wouldn't think it in the slightest.

Ian Dent · Post by **Ian Dent** » Tue Jul 21, 2009 11:34 am

Takes about 45 seconds to set up your account and login.

I'd love to have a game against you.

David Williams · Post by **David Williams** » Tue Jul 21, 2009 11:43 am

Memory may play tricks, but surely Susie was accused of exactly this. She tried, not entirely successfully, to cut back on it. It doesn't bother me, but I can see how it could be annoying. If I were in Jeff's shoes I'd want someone to point it out if I had a potentially annoying habit I wasn't aware of.

James Robinson · Post by **James Robinson** » Tue Jul 21, 2009 12:19 pm

Ian Dent wrote:Takes about 45 seconds to set up your account and login.

I'd love to have a game against you.

Excellent, Ian. As soon as I get setup, I'll challenge you to a game.

Philip Jarvis · Post by **Philip Jarvis** » Tue Jul 21, 2009 2:05 pm

Percy Round wrote:A primary school teacher asked her class to make up a sentence using the same word twice, but attached to different words.

That reminds me of a joke I heard many years ago. It went something like this -

Paddy applied for a job as a roadsweeper. There were that many applicants, they had an aptitude test as part of the interview. Each candidate was asked to write down 2 linked sentences containing the words "great" and "fascinate". Paddy wrote the following:

"I've got a duffle coat at home and it's great. It's got nine buttons, but I can only fascinate."

Charlie Reams · Post by **Charlie Reams** » Tue Jul 21, 2009 2:24 pm

Philip Jarvis wrote:"I've got a duffle coat at home and it's great. It's got nine buttons, but I can only fascinate."

Are you Jon Corby in disguise? (If so, it's quite a good disguise.)

Philip Jarvis · Post by **Philip Jarvis** » Tue Jul 21, 2009 3:15 pm

Charlie Reams wrote:
Philip Jarvis wrote:"I've got a duffle coat at home and it's great. It's got nine buttons, but I can only fascinate."
Are you Jon Corby in disguise? (If so, it's quite a good disguise.)

Aaah! I missed that one from Jon.

Anyway - Jon's coat has got 10 buttons and mine's got 9!

Percy Round · Post by **Percy Round** » Tue Jul 21, 2009 6:06 pm

Thank you, Matt: I'm glad you agree with me. Countdown is a game about words, for heaven's sake. Yes, people often do use a favourite word when they can't think of another. I don't know which is better (or worse) - "fantastic" or "y'know".

Percy Round · Post by **Percy Round** » Tue Jul 21, 2009 9:53 pm

Looking back at what you said, Matt, I think "fantastic" is not the new "nice", but the new "fabulous". Remember how everyone seemed to use that word a year or two ago? But not, I think, as frequently as Jeff uses "fantastic".

Kai Laddiman · Post by **Kai Laddiman** » Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:11 pm

So, in conclusion:

Fantastic is the new fabulous.

Jeff Stelling is fantastic.

Percy Round · Post by **Percy Round** » Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:26 pm

Well, he was certainly kind to you, Kai, so I suppose that makes him fantastic in your eyes, but,of course, I never suggested that he was no good at his job, just that he needs to enlarge his vocabulary. I expect you'll be in bed now,so you can read this tomorrow.

Brian Moore · Post by **Brian Moore** » Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:27 pm

Percy Round wrote:Thank you, Matt: I'm glad you agree with me.

I know that Matt would agree with me that stating that someone agrees with you in these forums is a risky thing to do.

Phil Reynolds · Post by **Phil Reynolds** » Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:56 pm

Kai Laddiman wrote:Fantastic is the new fabulous.

Excellent.

Daniel O'Dowd · Post by **Daniel O'Dowd** » Wed Jul 22, 2009 12:27 am

Phil Reynolds wrote:
Kai Laddiman wrote:Fantastic is the new fabulous.
Excellent.

So excellent it makes me want to tent my non 104 yr old fingers with delight.

Peter Mabey · Post by **Peter Mabey** » Wed Jul 22, 2009 8:49 am

Phil Reynolds wrote:
Kai Laddiman wrote:Fantastic is the new fabulous.
Excellent.

Absolutely

Chris Corby · Post by **Chris Corby** » Wed Jul 22, 2009 9:10 am

Kai Laddiman wrote:
Fantastic is the new fabulous.

Okey doke.

Marc Meakin · Post by **Marc Meakin** » Wed Jul 22, 2009 10:59 am

Quite remarkable

Dinos Sfyris · Post by **Dinos Sfyris** » Wed Jul 22, 2009 11:00 am

Phil Reynolds wrote:
Kai Laddiman wrote:Fantastic is the new fabulous.
Excellent.

lol Excellent!

Matt Morrison · Post by **Matt Morrison** » Wed Jul 22, 2009 11:00 am

Dinos Sfyris wrote:
Phil Reynolds wrote:
Kai Laddiman wrote:Fantastic is the new fabulous.
Excellent.
lol Excellent!

Nice.

Kai Laddiman · Post by **Kai Laddiman** » Wed Jul 22, 2009 11:02 am

Matt Morrison wrote:
Dinos Sfyris wrote:
Phil Reynolds wrote: Excellent.
lol Excellent!
Nice.

Fantastic!

Percy Round · Post by **Percy Round** » Wed Jul 22, 2009 3:18 pm

Kai Laddiman was quoting the words in my post of 21st July 2009 at 9.53 pm, addressed to Matt.

Percy Round · Post by **Percy Round** » Wed Jul 22, 2009 3:21 pm

Just had a thought: I wonder if Kai will own up to his plagiarism. Will you Kai?

Marc Meakin · Post by **Marc Meakin** » Wed Jul 22, 2009 3:34 pm

Percy Round wrote:Just had a thought: I wonder if Kai will own up to his plagiarism. Will you Kai?

I don' think he was plagirising you. If you look at his post on Tue Jul 21, 2009 11:11 pm, he was only making a summary of what had been said.Others having taken it out of context

Kai Laddiman · Post by **Kai Laddiman** » Wed Jul 22, 2009 3:59 pm

Yeh, it's just a thing which people have 'liked', summing up a thread.

Andy Wilson · Post by **Andy Wilson** » Sun Aug 02, 2009 2:07 am

I know this thread's fizzled out but i've got a couple of jokes that are just like the other two but with the teacher wanting the kid to use the word contagious...

Kid says, the other day, i was in the car with my old man when we passed a lorry of oranges turned over with oranges everywhere and the poor driver standing there beside them. My old man said, 'It's gonna take the c@*t ages to pick them up'

The definitely one goes -

Johnny - Does farts come in lumps?
Teacher - No Johnny
Johnny - Well then I definitely s@8t my trousers.

Back of the net!

Sue Sanders · Post by **Sue Sanders** » Sun Aug 02, 2009 7:21 am

[quote="Andy Wilson"]I know this thread's fizzled out but...

Reviving an old thread, Andy? That is SOOOOOO Derek Hazell!

Jason Larsen · Post by **Jason Larsen** » Sun Aug 02, 2009 8:18 pm

I'm surprised he doesn't use the word "unbelievable" more often!

I guess that's because contestants finding 9-letter words are so commonplace that he doesn't need to.

If Drew Carey and Jeff Stelling were to mysteriously switch places, Drew would run all around the Granada Studio stage in Manchester when a contestant declares a 9 and go crazy! That's because he's never seen it done before. In turn, if Jeff Stelling saw a fabulous contestant on The Price is Right, I bet he would say, "Fantastic! You've just won both showcases!"

You see, it's all about how often a situation occurs. If a particularly boring episode of Countdown airs, would Jeff Stelling have any reason to say, "fantastic?"

Michael Wallace · Post by **Michael Wallace** » Sun Aug 02, 2009 8:27 pm

Jason Larsen wrote:You see, it's all about how often a situation occurs. If a particularly boring episode of Countdown airs, would Jeff Stelling have any reason to say, "fantastic?"

What if it was fantastically boring?

Derek Hazell · Post by **Derek Hazell** » Sun Aug 02, 2009 9:02 pm

Jason Larsen wrote:If Drew Carey and Jeff Stelling were to mysteriously switch places . . .

If I was to mysteriously switch words to say how we feel, I would say:
Well cum bach jays sun, weave mist ewe

Jason Larsen · Post by **Jason Larsen** » Sun Aug 02, 2009 9:12 pm

Derek, read the first post I wrote today.

nigelbrown · Post by **nigelbrown** » Wed Sep 23, 2009 9:13 pm

If fantastic now means 'Smug cunt' then I agree.

Sue Sanders · Post by **Sue Sanders** » Wed Sep 23, 2009 9:25 pm

nigelbrown wrote:If fantastic now means 'Smug cunt' then I agree.

YES!!!!!

Percy Round · Post by **Percy Round** » Wed Sep 23, 2009 10:09 pm

There is no need for vulgarity on this or any other website, Nigel. Some people, including me, find it very offensive and it suggests that you have a very limited vocabulary.

Jimmy Gough · Post by **Jimmy Gough** » Wed Sep 23, 2009 10:28 pm

nigelbrown wrote:If fantastic now means 'Smug cunt' then I agree.

Did he just use the c-word?!

Michael Wallace · Post by **Michael Wallace** » Wed Sep 23, 2009 10:31 pm

Jimmy Gough wrote:
nigelbrown wrote:If fantastic now means 'Smug cunt' then I agree.
Did he just use the c-word?!

This guy has made three posts, two of which feature the c-word, the other talking about gash. I think he's obsessed.

Jimmy Gough · Post by **Jimmy Gough** » Wed Sep 23, 2009 10:37 pm

Michael Wallace wrote:
Jimmy Gough wrote:
nigelbrown wrote:If fantastic now means 'Smug cunt' then I agree.
Did he just use the c-word?!
This guy has made three posts, two of which feature the c-word, the other talking about gash. I think he's obsessed.

I think he's gay.

Michael Wallace · Post by **Michael Wallace** » Wed Sep 23, 2009 10:50 pm

Jimmy Gough wrote:
Michael Wallace wrote:This guy has made three posts, two of which feature the c-word, the other talking about gash. I think he's obsessed.
I think he's gay.

This was my conclusions as well, yeah.

Kirk Bevins · Post by **Kirk Bevins** » Wed Sep 23, 2009 11:49 pm

I think he's RB.

Charlie Reams · Post by **Charlie Reams** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 12:04 am

Percy Round wrote:There is no need for vulgarity on this or any other website, Nigel. Some people, including me, find it very offensive and it suggests that you have a very limited vocabulary.

Bollocks.

Jason Larsen · Post by **Jason Larsen** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 1:11 am

Jeff Stelling would never say that, Nigel!

Sue Sanders · Post by **Sue Sanders** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 8:36 am

Jason Larsen wrote:Jeff Stelling would never say that, Nigel!

Nigel wasn't suggesting Jeff would say 'smug cunt', Jason - he's suggesting he is a smug cunt.

nigelbrown · Post by **nigelbrown** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 10:02 am

No suggesting about it Sue, he is that thing what I said. As well as being patronising, talentless and a very annoying waste of space. He has a face made for kicking repeatedly.

Percy Round · Post by **Percy Round** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 1:20 pm

Tut, tut, Charlie! Does your use of that one word of insult, criticism, derision or disagreement, frequently used on television mean that you think there is a need for vulgarity on your website? I presume it was aimed at me.

Charlie Reams · Post by **Charlie Reams** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 1:41 pm

Percy Round wrote:Tut, tut, Charlie! Does your use of that one word of insult, criticism, derision or disagreement, frequently used on television mean that you think there is a need for vulgarity on your website? I presume it was aimed at me.

I think it's overly simplistic to say there's no need for vulgarity, and I've never seen any evidence that swearing is correlated with a weak vocabulary. In fact English has a wonderfully wide lexicon when it comes to profanity, and to me it would seem rather a shame to ignore it.

Derek Hazell · Post by **Derek Hazell** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 1:42 pm

Charlie Reams wrote:I think it's overly simplistic to say there's no need for vulgarity, and I've never seen any evidence that swearing is correlated with a weak vocabulary. In fact English has a wonderfully wide lexicon when it comes to profanity, and to me it would seem rather a shame to ignore it.

I heard Stephen Fry make the same argument on an episode of the sadly missed Central Weekend once.

Jon Corby · Post by **Jon Corby** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 1:44 pm

Percy Round wrote:Tut, tut, Charlie! Does your use of that one word of insult, criticism, derision or disagreement, frequently used on television mean that you think there is a need for vulgarity on your website? I presume it was aimed at me.

I think his "bollocks" is a response to the "people who swear have a poor vocabulary" canard.

There's also a poll elsewhere on the forum in which the vast majority voted that swearing on the forum was fine. If someone who comes along who is only interested in swearing without contributing much else, chances are they'll just get banned (see: nigelbrown)

Jeffrey Burgin · Post by **Jeffrey Burgin** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 2:02 pm

I like Jeff Stelling.