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You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Tue Jul 13, 2010 11:22 pm
by Matt Morrison
(inspired by a bit of aptochat this evening)

Graeme Cole: You know you're playing this game too much when, as I've just done, you only realise it's midnight when a new duel appears.
Hugh Binnie: you know you're playing too much when you appear on the most time played page
Innis Carson: Or when you're #1 on the list by a margin of 10 days
Adam Gillard: or when your name's Adam Gillard

I'll open with a classic trueism and hope that funnier ones follow.
You know you're playing too much when you anagram every fucking word you see in real life.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Wed Jul 14, 2010 12:32 am
by Simon Myers
You know you're playing too much if you get excited when you see an obscure word "in the wild".

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Wed Jul 14, 2010 2:17 pm
by Ben Hunter
When you think everything written in ALL CAPS is an anagram.
Simon Myers wrote:"in the wild".
Love it :D

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Wed Jul 14, 2010 2:20 pm
by Matt Morrison
You know you're playing too much when you dream about apterous.

Come on, we've all been there. Last night I dreamed of a new 'infobox' for the front page, I remember it being really interesting and a Genuinely Good Idea but that's all I remember about it.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Wed Jul 14, 2010 2:25 pm
by Liam Tiernan
....you've got the exact change ready for a purchase of six different items,

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Wed Jul 14, 2010 3:15 pm
by Kai Laddiman
... you spend 10 minutes trying to think of a witty response to a thread called "You know you're playing too much apterous when..."

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Wed Jul 14, 2010 4:26 pm
by Chris Philpot
...you spot 12 fridge magnets on a friend's freezer and immediately rearrange them as if it's a Hyper letters round.

(AEHIILOPRRSVY, if anyone fancies a go. I think I maxed it with a 9 but I'd be pleased to hear otherwise.)

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Wed Jul 14, 2010 5:56 pm
by Ryan Taylor
when you take your laptop to the toilet with you. Does that count?

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Wed Jul 14, 2010 6:22 pm
by Marc Meakin
Ryan Taylor wrote:when you take your laptop to the toilet with you. Does that count?
Only if you don't taske your 'special' sock with you. :)

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Wed Jul 14, 2010 9:07 pm
by Ryan Taylor
Marc Meakin wrote:
Ryan Taylor wrote:when you take your laptop to the toilet with you. Does that count?
Only if you don't taske your 'special' sock with you. :)
You are obsessed with my sock!

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Wed Jul 14, 2010 9:19 pm
by Michael Wallace
You actually shout 'yes!' out loud when you finally beat the cunting Guardian.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Wed Jul 14, 2010 9:44 pm
by Ben Hunter
When your girlfriend points at your c4c display pic and shouts "that's you" and starts sobbing and after you've finished your marathon Letters Attack with Prune you turn around and all her stuff is gone.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Wed Jul 14, 2010 9:54 pm
by Ben Hunter
You're playing it on Lightweight Mode because you're logging in from a dodgy wifi spot in the town centre after having been evicted from your house for spending all your housing benefit on updating the subscriptions to your multiple accounts, and a tramp keeps suggesting five letter words that aren't even there.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Wed Jul 14, 2010 10:12 pm
by Heather Badcock
Ben Hunter wrote:When your girlfriend points at your c4c display pic and shouts "that's you" and starts sobbing and after you've finished your marathon Letters Attack with Prune you turn around and all her stuff is gone.
..when you actually meet your girlfriend/boyfriend on apterous.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Thu Jul 15, 2010 8:52 am
by John Gillies
...when you're sitting in a hospital waiting room, bored out of your tits and reading all the wall notices when you realise 'diarrhoea' is a good 9 :D

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Thu Jul 15, 2010 10:13 am
by Marc Meakin
John Gillies wrote:...when you're sitting in a hospital waiting room, bored out of your tits and reading all the wall notices when you realise 'diarrhoea' is a good 9 :D
But not a hard one eh. :)

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Sat Jul 17, 2010 3:39 pm
by Eoin Monaghan
You're watching the show with a non apterist and they shout "Ooh, another A woulda given a nine."

And you're like "Speedgoat."

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Sat Jul 17, 2010 10:32 pm
by Heather Badcock
Matt Morrison makes a picture of you to represent your team in the Apterous World Cup, and you track down the person who's head you've been superimposed on to and send him a facebook friend request, and he accepts.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Mon Jul 19, 2010 10:15 am
by Jon Corby
1. You develop a fascination for blonde-haired, blue-eyed guys.
2. Your cell phone has the Bolero of Fire ring tone.
3. You try to persuade your blonde guy friend to add green to his wardrobe.
4. When feeling hopeless, you catch yourself pleading heavenward, "Din, Farore, Nyru, Goddesses of Hyrule, lend me your strength."
5. You take up archery as a hobby.
6. When observing different species of spiders at the zoo, you exclaim, "Hey! That one looks just like a skulltula."
7. The southwest wall of your bedroom is covered with every existing Zelda wallpaper and entitled "The Legend of Zelda: Shrine of Ages."
8. In History class, you find yourself searching a map for the land of Hyrule.
9. You have an uncontrollable urge to beat the crap out of everyone who badmouths the Legend of Zelda.
10. You notice how you and Princess Zelda (or Link) share distinct physical and psychological similarities.
11. At first, you are enraged at the creator, producer, and cast of the Lord of the Rings, claiming that they stole their ideas from the Legend of Zelda series. You later fall in love with Legolas because he bears an uncanny resemblance to Link.
12. You find yourself blushing and your heart rate quickening whenever you view a close-up photo of Link.
13. You carry a photo of Link in your wallet, claiming that he's your boyfriend and one and only true love.
14. You gaze longingly at the countryside, wondering if darkness will fall before you reach the end of the field.
15. You demand respect from your peers, claiming you were born with the Trifore of Wisdom.
16. You constantly wonder if Shigeru Miyamoto will ever let Link and Zelda publicly admit their feelings for one another.
17. You examine the creation of Hyrule over and over in your mind, wondering how on Earth can the three goddesses live among villagers as oracles.
18. You argue that Peter Pan and Robin Hood are Hero-of-Time wannabes.
19. You develop a two-page theorem on why Link turned into a pink bunny rabbit in the Dark World in his A Link to the Past adventure.
20. When you first hear the new Eclipse gum commercial jingle, you shout, "Hey, that's a rip-off of the Serenade of Water!"
21. When you have difficulty completing a temple and die eight times consecutively, you yell at the TV screen, throw down the controller, and storm angrily out of the room. You then return five minutes later, apologize to Link, and beg for his cooperation.
22. You lie awake at night trying to place the Legend of Zelda adventures into chronological order.
23. You identify the you are having withdrawal symptoms when at school, you constantly glance at the clock, counting down the hours standing between you and your video game play. When you can't take it any longer, you run out of the classroom mumbling, "Ganon has enslaved the nation. The world can't wait any longer."

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Mon Jul 19, 2010 10:22 am
by Charlie Reams
Jon Corby wrote:1. You develop a fascination for blonde-haired, blue-eyed guys.
*bats eyelids*

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Mon Jul 19, 2010 10:27 am
by Jon Corby
Charlie Reams wrote:
Jon Corby wrote:1. You develop a fascination for blonde-haired, blue-eyed guys.
*bats eyelids*
Hahaha that's funny, I hadn't even bothered to read it. What a beautiful coincidence.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Mon Jul 19, 2010 8:10 pm
by Heather Badcock
...you just covered a Chemistry lesson and you taught a class of teenagers that Kirk Bevins destroyed the periodic table, beacuse only Kirk Bevins understands the element of surprise.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 11:22 am
by Kirk Bevins
You can't go past "let agreed" signs, BT "open reach" vans or look at "neutradol" in public toilets without thinking "relegated, chaperone and outlander" respectively.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 12:35 pm
by Ryan Taylor
Kirk Bevins wrote:You can't go past "let agreed" signs, BT "open reach" vans or look at "neutradol" in public toilets without thinking "relegated, chaperone and outlander" respectively.
And then chuckle to yourself whilst cleaning your teeth with Colgate and Listerine.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 10:08 pm
by Lesley Hines
You're choosing your children's names according to the anagrams.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2010 10:17 pm
by Hugh Binnie
Lesley Hines wrote:You're choosing your children's names according to the anagrams.
I actually rather like this idea. I might have to call one of my children Patton (I'm sure he'd forgive me eventually) because it nicely anagrams to NOT BIPINNATE, which would be true (always a plus for name anagrams, right?) and have the added benefit of teaching him a potentially useful word. :)

...Or maybe Horatio, and encourage him to partake in amusing drunkennesses. So many possibilities; so little child-making time!

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Sat Jul 31, 2010 9:58 am
by Matt Morrison
You know you're playing too much apterous when...

...you get up two hours earlier than you wanted to on a Saturday (at 8am this morning; true story) because you had horrible nightmares populated by people from C4C and apterous. Seriously, you know a dream isn't going to end well when it starts with Innis Carson asking your girlfriend for a lighter to spark up a Malboro Red whilst standing on a wall.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Sat Jul 31, 2010 1:28 pm
by Eoin Monaghan
You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Your teacher says a word and asks if anyone has heard it before, you stick your hand up and they ask what it means, but you don't have a clue as you only know it from Apterous.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Mon Aug 02, 2010 12:49 pm
by Dinos Sfyris
You tell someone "Let's go for pasta!" when you mean tapas

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Mon Aug 02, 2010 1:45 pm
by Kirk Bevins
When you meet a hot girl in a nightclub and she says her name is Thea and you say "haha, that's an anagram of hate".

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Mon Aug 02, 2010 1:47 pm
by Charlie Reams
Kirk Bevins wrote:When you meet a hot girl in a nightclub and she says her name is Thea and you say "haha, that's an anagram of hate".
Let me guess... she laughed and left?

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Mon Aug 02, 2010 2:04 pm
by Kirk Bevins
Charlie Reams wrote: Let me guess... she laughed and left?
Haha no she laughed and said that's quite cool. I said don't be stupid. End of anecdote.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Mon Aug 02, 2010 8:14 pm
by Matt Morrison
Kirk Bevins wrote:
Charlie Reams wrote: Let me guess... she laughed and left?
Haha no she laughed and said that's quite cool. I said don't be stupid. End of anecdote.
I don't even understand the flow of that conversation Kirk, but I love it, you utter mentalist.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Mon Aug 02, 2010 8:41 pm
by David O'Donnell
Isn't most of this stuff bordering on schizophrenia?

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Mon Aug 02, 2010 8:44 pm
by Eoin Monaghan
David O'Donnell wrote:Isn't most of this stuff bordering on schizophrenia?
No it's not
Yes it is
Not
Is

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Tue Aug 03, 2010 12:32 am
by Kirk Bevins
David O'Donnell wrote:Isn't most of this stuff bordering on schizophrenia?
How? It actually happened.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Tue Aug 03, 2010 8:16 am
by David O'Donnell
Kirk Bevins wrote:
David O'Donnell wrote:Isn't most of this stuff bordering on schizophrenia?
How? It actually happened.
I think one of the symptoms is an inability to properly process information and attributing significance to data that is not really significant. For instance you might see two cars with an E and a 6 in their registration and think it's the government monitoring you. Or you might think that an anagram of a word is significant like going for pasta when you mean tapas or hating a girl because she is called Thea (I know you didn't go that far [certainly not all the way]).

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Tue Aug 03, 2010 10:22 am
by Kirk Bevins
David O'Donnell wrote: or hating a girl because she is called Thea (I know you didn't go that far [certainly not all the way]).
It's also an anagram of "heat" and she was certainly hot.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Tue Aug 03, 2010 10:53 am
by Eoin Monaghan
You're in a shop with 99% reductions, yet all you think about is INTRODUCES.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Tue Aug 03, 2010 11:06 am
by Liam Tiernan
Kirk Bevins wrote:
David O'Donnell wrote: or hating a girl because she is called Thea (I know you didn't go that far [certainly not all the way]).
It's also an anagram of "heat" and she was certainly hot.
And yet you chose to go with HATE? Smooth.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Tue Aug 03, 2010 11:26 am
by Matt Morrison
You know you're playing too much apterous when...

...you have actually missed out on sex for the sake of "one more game". On more than one occasion.

Yup - *hangs head in shame* - another true story.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Tue Aug 03, 2010 11:38 am
by Kirk Bevins
Liam Tiernan wrote: And yet you chose to go with HATE? Smooth.
It's slightly cooler than HEAT (if you excuse the pun).

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Tue Aug 03, 2010 2:12 pm
by David O'Donnell
Matt Morrison wrote:You know you're playing too much apterous when...

...you have actually missed out on sex for the sake of "one more game". On more than one occasion.

Yup - *hangs head in shame* - another true story.
Most people are playing on apterous because they don't get sex but you give up sex to play omfg!

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Tue Aug 03, 2010 2:39 pm
by Charlie Reams
Matt Morrison wrote:You know you're playing too much apterous when...

...you have actually missed out on sex for the sake of "one more game". On more than one occasion.

Yup - *hangs head in shame* - another true story.
Yeah but, apterous is also the reason you're getting offered sex in the first place. Talk about ungrateful.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Wed Aug 04, 2010 4:43 pm
by Heather Badcock
Matt Morrison wrote:You know you're playing too much apterous when...

...you have actually missed out on sex for the sake of "one more game". On more than one occasion.

Yup - *hangs head in shame* - another true story.
Matt just asked me to like this.

Dear Matt,
I DON'T like this.
OK?

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when

Posted: Tue Aug 10, 2010 11:04 pm
by Miriam Nussbaum
…you read the following in the bug reports thread:
Andrew Feist wrote:ClientGame624 [CXPLAY]: java.lang.ClassCastException: java.lang.Character cannot be cast to [Lapterous.game.RoundSummary;
and immediately think "SPORULATE"

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Fri Sep 10, 2010 8:22 pm
by Eoin Monaghan
You get a Powerpoint to do on an EU country, and you get Estonia, what's the first thing that comes to your mind? Is it, "Oh dear, that's a hard one" or "Hmm, can I name any famous Estonians?"

No, It's that Estonia is an anagram of ATONIES.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Sat Sep 11, 2010 6:47 am
by Robert Baxter
Your trial expires in one day.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Mon Sep 13, 2010 11:42 pm
by Jonathan Wynn
You see the name 'Matthew Le Tissier' and think there's been a misprint...........

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Tue Sep 14, 2010 9:11 am
by Adam Gillard
... you log on to do the Duel, only to realise that you already did it at 12.01 am

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Thu Sep 16, 2010 12:57 am
by Adam Gillard
... you get given a nickname by Charles "Charlie" Reams (seriously though, I'm quite pleased with "Cheeky").

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Thu Sep 16, 2010 6:52 pm
by Ryan Taylor
...you are struck with severe cramp in the hamstring meaning you have to play the remainder of your game against Innis laid on the floor with straight legs like some spaz.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Thu Sep 16, 2010 10:59 pm
by Ian Volante
...you enter a joke word ANALISED when you can't see anything better than DENIALS, even when the ninth letter is a Y.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Mon Sep 20, 2010 1:07 pm
by Jon Corby
...you're not allowed on Countdown.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Mon Sep 20, 2010 4:32 pm
by D Eadie
.......you think getting a 9-letter word is a form of sexual experience.

.......you're still a virgin at 28.

.......you see 'Kirk Bevins left the room' on the screen, then get up and lock the door behind you.

........you see 'Kirk Bevins entered the room' on the screen, and feel somewhat violated.

.......you wear a nappy during your games so you don't have to stop for the toilet.

.....you do the above, but you're on a train.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Tue Sep 21, 2010 11:32 am
by Dinos Sfyris
There's a new film out by Guillermo Del Toro but you're like "Wooooooooaaaahhhhh GLOMERULI ROOTLED innit!"

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Sat Oct 02, 2010 4:37 pm
by Eoin Monaghan
... you get excited when you see HAPLOID, DIPLOID, MITOSIS, MEIOSIS, SOMATIC and GAMETES all in one Science lesson and say to yourself "That's what they mean."
... you have to make sure you don't write COETERNAL by accident instead of TOLERANCE in Technology.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Sat Oct 02, 2010 4:54 pm
by Ryan Taylor
...the first ever postcard you send is to somebody you've met once and lives in the USA.

...you sack off the first day of uni to go watch someone play Countdown.

...you actually send money in a birthday card to someone you've never met.

...mainly people from apterous comment on your facebook statuses rather than real friends.

...you ring someone from apterous and talk shit for 5 minutes in the rain resulting in a water damaged phone.

...you take photographs of objects/signs just because it has an apterites name on it or whatever.

...your housemates know all about Kirk Bevins, Matt Morrison, Innis Carson etc.

...you would rather play another goatblitz than head over to milffox.com.

...it's your homepage.

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Sat Oct 02, 2010 6:34 pm
by Ben Hunter
Ryan Taylor wrote:...you ring someone from apterous and talk shit for 5 minutes in the rain resulting in a water damaged phone.
5 minutes eh... can't wait for you to see the phone bill :twisted:

Re: You know you're playing too much apterous when...

Posted: Sat Oct 02, 2010 7:25 pm
by Charlie Reams
Ryan Taylor wrote:...the first ever postcard you send is to somebody you've met once and lives in the USA.
..with the incorrect postage so it never arrives.